Actorviews (1923)

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46 Actorviews day. He gets him a bite of Star eating-tobacco offen Lut Jennings, and chews round without a word till finally nobody could stand it any longer and Jedge Pennoyer up and says: “ ‘Land o’ prunes, Josh, what you got on your mind ?' “ ‘Shock,’ says Josh, very quiet. ‘I happened home ’n hour earlier ’n usual today, and as I walks through the settin’-room I see young Doc Snodgrass kissin’ my wife.’ “What the town’d waited for had come. Everybody in the store was silent for a minute.” And for a minute Mildred was silent, too. “Then Jedge Pennoyer he says to Hennery’s uncle, ‘Josh,’ he says terribly anxious, ‘what did yo’ do?’ “ ‘I grabbed up the pail,’ says old Josh, ‘and went out and fed the calf — and I guess by the way I slammed the door they see I don’t like it very well.’ “Coupla days later the Jedge asks him what he’s done ’bout young Doc Snodgrass. “ ‘Ain’t had time t’ do nothin’ yet,’ says Josh, T>ut, by Hekr, before Saturday Pm going to make him give me a sack of flour!’ “Do you wronder I git homesick for home?” said Mildred, with her third helping of peppermint. And — perhaps because we were in a drug store — the talk somehow drifted to the mixture with which every night, before appearing as the statue, Mildred coats her gleaming body. Informally I was told that the fluid is composed of oxide of zinc, witch-hazel, bay-rum, rose-water and glycerin. “You try it first on your arm, to see it’s the right thinness,” said Mildred to me — to me ! “And you must be keerful not to sit down after ’t dries — it’ll crack on you.”