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YOU MUST REMAIN SPOTLESS FOR SIX MONTHS
rigged in a nine-dollar suit. Cohan nearly dropped off until he learnt that the thief was K. K. Kidd's son.
"The next morning papa got a bill itemized as follows : One figure, $80.00; one suit, $70.00. Total, $150.00. And he drew his check without a quiver and laughed his fat sides into a jelly ove1^ the escapade.
"Things went from bad to worse, until one day the Kidd attended a swell dance and fell head over heels in love with little Elsie Lucas.
"This didn't please Elsie at all, you know, for she happened to be engaged at the time to young Tom Grahame.
"But the Gilded Kidd buzzed around her like a bottle-fly ; erased initials on her dance-card and finally dragged her off to the conservatory.
"He looked so love-sick that she finally asked him what his ailment was and suggested what a careless doctor he must have.
"Thereupon the Kidd turned peagreen, flopped down on his knees, got a strangle-hold on her hand and asked her to marry him.
"Elsie laughed — what else could she do? — and ended up by promis
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ing her hand if he remained spotlessly good for a period of six months.
"You see, she wasn't faithless to honest Tom, as she knew the Kidd would get himself into a scrape as soon as his back was turned.
"Sure enough, at the Owl Club the next afternoon the Kidd got into an argument about the blessings of the rich. Somebody hinted he wouldn't be arrested if he pinched the cemetery, while a poor hobo had just been calaboosed for merely sleeping in it.
"Words waxed warm, and Tom Grahame, the sly dog, took a hand in the baiting.
' ' The upshot of the matter was that Tom wagered the Kidd that he couldn't get himself arrested and confined in jail in the space of three days.
"It looked easy to the Kidd, and he proceeded to stack up his money against all comers, until he had them all covered and begging for mercy.
' ' Now you might think the Kidd had an easy chance turning off criminal concoctions, but remember — every one knew him ; knew his father, old K. K., and a devilish fine chance for compound interest would go flitting if