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18
THE MOTION PICTURE STORY MAGAZINE
well enough, but mix in women and there 's trouble, right off ! ' '
"Aw, come off, Jim," laughed Ned Billings, the youngest of the trio; "just 'cause some woman let you down hard 's no reason for bein, sore on 'em all."
' ' No woman ever did ! ' ' flared Jim, "but there's just one reason — they never got no chance. I seen enough o' that kind o' thing to last me forever, when my poor old dad married his second wife — and he aint the only
please, free to stay as long as we're a min' ter, and go home when we git ready, and put our little, yellow envelopes in our own pockets on Saturday night. That's what I call comfort ! ' '
"Guess you're level-headed, Jim," laughed Ned, shaking back the black hair that waved over his boyish face, and ordering another round of drinks before he went on talking. " I 'd hate to think of divvyin' up my little twelve per with anybody — I have to
A BACHELORS PROTECTIVE LEAGUE
livin' example I could tell you about ! What 's a man got to gain by marryin '? "
"Home comforts?" suggested Bill, rather timidly. All of Bill's remarks bordered on the timid or the deprecating. He was what might be called the neutral third of the little party.
' ' Sure thing ! ' ' sneered Jim. ' ' Look around at your married friends — run over the list — call 'em comfortable? Tied down in some little two-by-four flat, helpin' tend the kids and hearin' the woman's everlastin' clack about the new hat she cant have, aint they ? And we sit here, comfortable as you
stretch it till it squawks now to make it see me thru the week. ' '
1 ' Well, ' ' cried Jim, suddenly bringing his great hand down on the table with a thump, "I hope you'll have sense enough to stick to that there idee — I'm older 'n you be, and I'd hate to see you makin' a fool of yourself."
"Jim 'd make a good president for an anti-marryin ' club," laughed Bill.
"Now you've struck it!" declared Jim, instantly. "We'll form one — the three of us. Right here's where we agree to be the three jolly bachelors, and to stick together as long as we live. Shake on it ! "