We use Optical Character Recognition (OCR) during our scanning and processing workflow to make the content of each page searchable. You can view the automatically generated text below as well as copy and paste individual pieces of text to quote in your own work.
Text recognition is never 100% accurate. Many parts of the scanned page may not be reflected in the OCR text output, including: images, page layout, certain fonts or handwriting.
FILM FLAM
By Louis M. Bailey
Pointer for West Point
WE are beginning to feel that, after all, we have been prophets crying in the wilderness. In spite of all we have said about amateur movies being the ideal way to analyze in slow motion the faults of one's croquet stroke, backgammon moves, pingpong serve, or even rolling pin technique, we learn from the press that officials of the United States Military Academy have ignored our wisdom completely. It seems there is pressing need to show each cadet just how he looks when cantering around the riding hall on old Dobbin. While this may be treason or lese majesty, the inference may be drawn that not all of our future generals produce poems in motion while on horseback. But to overcome these flaws in horsemanship, are the authorities planning to take our tip and film each offender with an amateur camera so
"CAMERA-ANGLE STUFF, EH?"
HEARD ON A HOME MOVIE SET
He: "My Dear, You Remind Me So Of Gloria
Swanson." She: "But More Subtle, Don't You Think?"
that he may study his faults in slow motion until he overcomes them? No, our solution has been completely ignored. Instead, they are asking the government to line the hall with huge
mirrors which, to us, at best, seems an inadequate makeshift. However, we do not believe that any affront to Film Flam in this matter was intended. Being broad-minded, we attribute it to human vanity. Nevertheless, we still believe that even this frailty could be better satisfied by amateur movies.
Ultimatum
THE colored mammy who has done the Colburn laundry "fo' two generations" was somewhat upset on seeing herself for the first time on the home movie screen. .lunior had caught her just as the back yard clothes line broke for the second time and her verbal expostulations were not the sort a "lady" would care to have repeated. This incident on the screen occasioned but a single comment, "If them pitchers start talkin' I's aint never goin' to wash no mo' clothes!"
Fiends for Punishment
WE were horrified the other evening to see a film showing how the religious fanatics of India torture themselves by fastening hooks in their flesh, embroidering their skin with pins, or impaling their tongues with skewers. We left the theatre thanking a kindly Providence for favoring us with a country where this sort of thing is unknown. But we are beginning to doubt that now. It would seem that the Hindu philosophy is beginning to affect even American youth. Our proof — well, one need only think of mothers-in-law, motorcycle cops or insurance salesmen in connection with a song which is just now being bellowed by the younger set, // / Had A Talking Picture of You.