TV Radio Mirror (Jan - Jun 1963)

CONNIE FRANCIS (Continued from page 34) Test Number 5 You Want to Be Good for Him. When you love a person and respect him, you want to do little kind things that don't seem to pop into your mind with other people. You want to be good for him and to him. . . . You can enjoy spending time with some boys, and after you get to know them better, you can find yourself becoming careless in front of them. But with someone you love, you want everything to be right. Most of all, you want to be right, because his loving you brings out the softest, most feminine side of you. When you're in love, your own ego becomes much less important. I don't mean you suppress it entirely, because then you'd be a nothing. But things you used to emphasize seem less important. . . . This doesn't mean that you have to bring yourself down to make him feel big. You just want to do things that are tender and kind instead of selfish. Does this attitude make you lose or sacrifice any part of your own personality? Not for one second, because doing something for someone else makes you more of a person. So, when you're really in love, you want to do things for your loved one. But the test isn't complete unless you can do things for him without his knowing it. . . . The only way to give lovingly is to do it freely, without having to talk about your great generosity all the time. None of this means you're less of a person. It just means you're a better person. . . . When you love someone enough to be unselfish, you can stop thinking "/" all the time. It's then you can start thinking "we." Test Number 6 Put Him to The Test. Now, when you're dating a boy, you see each other under special circumstances. Even when it's just a date to do homework or watch television or go for a walk — that is, when you're most likely to be yourselves— it's still special, for one essential reason: You're not married. And that makes a big difference. You can look at a boy you date and see a relatively carefree young man who wouldn't know how to define words like "mortgage." . . . But suppose you're really serious about him. You're really considering him as a marriage partner. You seriously wonder how he'll rate as a husband. . . . Well, there's just one way to find out: Put him to the test, too. And he'll never even have to know about it. You can start by asking yourself a few pointed questions. For instance : What would he be like if you saw each other every day, morning and night, week after week, year after year? What would he be like after you've gone out and rented that honeymoon apartment, and then the bills start flooding in? . . . What would that tan, carefree face be like with a frown of irri tation or wrinkles of worry about money, office conflicts or the furnace? Finally, remember the day you had that awful toothache (or whatever) : What if you didn't live with your parents anymore ... if you had to get up and make this boy's breakfast before he went to work . . . care for one or two babies all day. . . ? Would he still look as good to you as he does today? Would he understand? Could you count on him to help? In other words, how would he measure up as husband, father, family man? My Kind of Man First of all, I think a man who'd make a good husband has to be a person with great love and respect for his own family — not just for his father and mother, but for family traditions. He shouldn't be a swinger to such a point that everything traditional about marriage is "square" and "corny." Any man you consider as a husband has got to love children. He's got to be interested in them and able to play with them, and he shouldn't consider them a waste of time, a nuisance, or threat to his own freedom. A man should love things that aren't just material. Even though he may be the roughest, toughest businessman in the world, he's got to have a tender side, too. He can't be afraid to show some sentimental feeling, and in order for him to be a warm, gentle husband, this warmth and gentleness have to be there in the first place. Vote Today-A Gift Is Waiting For You ! We'll put your name on one of 400 prizes — and all you have to do is fill out and mail this ballot. This month the prize — lor the first 400 ballots we receive — is "Mark It and Strike It," an intimate self-portrait by TV's funnyman, Steve Allen. The autobiography has been called "eye-opening, provocative, witty." Be sure to mail your ballot today to win this book. Paste this ballot on a postcard and send it to TV Radio Mirror, Box 2150, Grand Central Station. New York 17, New York. MY FAVORITES ARE: MALE STAR: 1. 2. 3. FEMALE STAR: 1 2. 3. FAVORITE STORY IN THIS ISSUE 1. 2. 3. THE NEWCOMER I'D LIKE MOST TO READ ABOUT: THE FAMOUS PERSON, NOT IN SHOW BUSINESS, I'D LIKE TO READ ABOUT: Y • Name Age v : r ■ Address ■ 1-63 76 The Test You Can't Use Six tests for lasting love! You'll find many boys who can pass one or two, maybe even three or four. But all six — well, he won't be so easy to find, and that's the way it should be. I'd just like to add one test you can't use, no matter how much you're tempted — and you'll soon see why. Here it is : Do you feel as if you can't live without him? "Oh, yes," I would have said once. "I'm miserable when we're apart. I'm only happy and complete when we're together. Surely, this must be real love." But the reason it wasn't is that I've felt exactly the same way at least half a dozen times since then — just as lonely, just as miserable, just as incomplete without half a dozen different boys. So even if you don't feel quite as happy or quite as interesting or quite as alive when he's not with you — don't use it as a test for marriage-type love. It's not. You can be infatuated and feel the same way. You can have a crush on Frankie Avalon and feel the same way. You can worship the chemistry teacher and feel the same way. And when you meet the boy you'll marry, you'll feel the same way. But the difference is this: He can pass the six real tests for real love besides, and measure up to every one! —The End Key to first test: Questions 1 to 5, yes. Question 6, double yes! Questions 7, 8, and 9, no. And Question 10, triple no!