TV Radio Mirror (Jan - Jun 1963)

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The answer came quickly, before he had time to think about being discreet. "Clara is like that. Clara is most of these things." "So," I interrupted again, "it looks like it's Dick Chamberlain and Clara Ray to the altar we go. Eh?" "Hold on, boy, hold on!" Dick bolted forward in his chair. "I'm not quite ready to say that. With my schedule of work, I barely get to see Clara once or twice a week. "So. if I can't date the girl steady, how am I going to establish an engagement? What girl would put up with it? Everything I do these days is work, or is tied up with my work. Going here and there for publicity purposes, rehearsals, singing lessons. "It's rough, man, and that kind of a schedule doesn't lead to marriage — not my kind of marriage." The hope that lies ahead Dick's ideal kind of marriage may be a mirage. He may have set goals that are too difficult to reach. After all. in the years ahead his career promises to be even busier and more demanding. If that is his future, then what will he do about marriage? "I can adjust to my career," he said hopefully. "I can slow down the pace without losing the momentum — but it'll take a little doing." Dick feels obligated to give his wife and his children a lot of his time. Therefore, he won't barge into marriage without the guarantee that he'll be able to give his family all that he can of himself— of body and physical presence at the old homestead. If, as Dick says, he has no intention of having his marriage patterned after his parents, then is there any person in the world he would like to follow? Yes, there is — his brother, Bill. Bill is happily married, has a lovely wife. Pat, and three wonderful children: Carol, 8; Bill Jr., 7; and Michael, 4. "I've seen my brother's marriage from the beginning," Dick says. "And the best thing about it is that it's got a lot of spirit. They like to run up to the lodge and ski, or rush down to the water and skim over the waves in Bill's boat. "They also love to entertain. I remember going there not too long ago with a date. I was taking a girl to the beach and we dropped by Bill's for a minute. It turned out they were having a birthday party for Bill Jr. They invited us back for a drink after the beach. We went — and we had a ball. "At one point, Patty mentioned a record I'd given her last Christmas. It was an African record with much drumbeating. A really very sexy thing. We played it and danced to it. It went on like that for quite a while. I'm sure the neighbors heard us. "But Bill didn't care. Nor did Pat. Their relationship is so free, and there's no self-consciousness. That's the main thing I like about my brother's family — it's relaxed enough, and it's not selfconscious. "My own family was not nearly so adventurous when Bill and I were kids. It seems that it was too much trouble even to go horseback riding. A pity!" Naturally, a guy who marries must have ideas on what he'd want for his wife and for his son. Dick is beginning to have very explicit ideas now, which may be an indication that he is as ready as any bachelor ever was. Listen to him talk about these things and see if that isn't so. "I would want to give my wife the freedom to be herself. I wouldn't marry a girl unless I loved her. And it is implicit in love to have a complete acceptance of what a person is, and not to try to make that person over. "I also would try my best to be around enough to be a part of the family, rather than a kind of visitor. "The one quality of my brother's marriage I'd certainly want in my own is that knack of being able to have fun. fun, fun. "With my own family, again, when we were kids — partly because of the times, I guess — the thought always seemed to be: 'We'll have our fun later, when we can afford it.' "But with my brother everything is now. Now we're going to have fun ! And I think that's a healthier attitude. "Moreover, Bill and Pat are very good with the kids. They give them a lot of independence, and a lot of opportunity to take care of things, like pets." "Everything I can give" So that brought up the question of what Dick would want for his own son. "It's got to be everything I can give him." Dick said with deadly seriousness. "I've got to give him discipline but also freedom. That may sound contradictory, but it isn't if you analyze it and think about it. The discipline is inherent in the way you bring up the boy, training him to think for himself and to act intelligently on his own. If you do a good job of it, then he has merited his freedom. "I think also that I would give my son the opportunities that were never opened to me. I'd give him what he wants when he wants it — not later. Life is too short. Miss out on something today and you find that you can't have it tomorrow. At least not with the same glee and satisfaction you would experience if you had it when you wanted it." It seemed to me, as I left Dick, that he was a guy who had at last found himself indeed. He had told me he had just begun to get acquainted with himself and only recently had figured out the answer to "Who am I?" Perhaps very soon Dick will also have the answer to the problem of marriage. And when he does, marriage will not be a problem to him. — George Carpozi Jr. Dick stars in "Dr. Kildare," NBC-TV. Thursday, from 8:30 to 9:30 p.m. est. He's also a singer — on MGM Records.