Screenland (Nov 1950-Oct 1951)

The sex of an individual has nothing to do with his need to be loved, his need to feel important in some respect, his need to seek some sort of security, and his need to search for new experiences. Fortunately, Sue and I have always been able to talk to one another about everything. There have been many times when we have talked all night. Incidentally, there is a great difference between a discussion and a quarrel. We never raise our voices, never use discourteous terms, never forget that we are adult individuals, each entitled to respect from the other. I won't say that we have never had a quarrel, because thinking individuals are bound, on occasion, to reach different conclusions from the same evidence. Check the decisions of the U.S. Supreme Court, if you doubt me. Taking this into consideration, we have always tried to maintain a situation best described by that wonderful British phrase, "the loyal opposition." We may have been opposed on some issues, but this never altered the fact that we were loyal to one another. We remained, indivisibly, The Ladds. Incidentally, in case I have begun to sound pretty solemn, I might as well confess that, occasionally, I have caught Sue slipping from the practice of absolute honesty with me. This flaw in her character has been discovered only because of a flaw in my own: I am a snooper. On a rainy day, when Sue has taken the children to the dentist or on a shopping trip and our secretary has gone to town on an errand, I like to investigate desk drawers and read my way through dusty files. In this way I discovered that Sue manages to hide the bad reviews of my pictures. She is jubilant over my good notices and meets me at the door with them, but something seems to happen to the critical writings. That "something," I have discovered, is a system of filing them in the back of a little-used drawer in my secretary's desk. Sue is tender-hearted. She can't bear to see someone hurt. Hiding a critic's blast does not come under the heading of complete wifely honesty, but I suppose I might as well let it pass. According to divorce statistics, one of the great trouble-causers in American marriage is disagreement over management of the family finances. Sue and I run our bank account the same way we run our conversation: fifty-fifty. She knows what the income is, how much must be set aside for taxes, how much must go into insurance, upkeep of the home, budgets for the children's education and so on. Although each of us takes a small and equal personal allowance from the pay check, and in all other respects we try to regulate expenditures on a fifty-fifty basis, Sue always defers to my final decision about a major family investment. She insists that I keep the veto power; I think this is a satisfying experience for a man. At Christmas time last year, for instance, we had decided to be economical. 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