Variety (Dec 1905)

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VARIETY. m — — — ■ KEENEY'S. The orchestra plays four overtures before the first act makes its appear- ance at Keeney's, but an intermission is entirely forgotten. The male portion of the audience would be perfectly willing to waive a few of the orchestral selec- tions for a chance to go out "to see a man" later. Delia Fox is on the bill boards as the drawing card for this week. Whether the society element of the "Bedford Sec- tion" waited for "amateur night," or for some unknown reason, they did not at- tack the theatre in force on Wednesday evening to hear Miss Fox sing three songs and decline to repeat even the chorus of her favorite number. Miss Fox is deserving of a great deal of praise since her entrance into vaude- ville. Casting aside the matter of her name, she has striven to please, and has succeeded. While dressed as a boy she smokes a cigarette gracefully. Also while doing so, she inhales the smoke. The "inhale" on a stage is obnoxious to many, and should be stopped. Harry Thomson, "The Mayor of the Bowery," had some good local talk which made a hit. After giving it, he surpris- ingly retired, and persistently refused to do anything more—for three seconds. The audience demanded; Harry obliged. You couldn't stop him after that. His stories and imitations stretched out to such a length that before finishing, he was repeating. "The Columbians," a family of five on their looks, dance and sing with some piano playing. Claire does the auto- matic doll, playing "A Hot Time" on the piano, announcing that it is Will H. Fox's. It Is Charles Sweet's, as Fox never used it. Some piano dancing after Clara Morton is done by Claire, who is a very young afrl with a voice smaller than herself. ^Ruth, another daughter probably, sings while thinking of some- thing else, and Marilynn fills in in hopes of escaping the Gerry Society. The act is called "A Bit of Dresden China," but which of the five is the "bit" can not be determined^ Billee Taylor, John L. Kearney, Fran- ces Golden and Grace Naesmith are the cast of "Wanted—A Stenographer." All excepting Taylor are new in it. Mr. Tay- lor's voice is not as sweet as when last heard in vaudeville, and he has con- tracted the comic opera tenor's method. Mr. Kearney makes up too young for the part, but plays it with spirit. Fran- ces Golden is satisfactory, but Miss Nae- smith gives a lifelike Imitation of a lay figure. Hammond and Forrester are "Come- dians from the West." The girl is pretty in a blond wig which doesn't fit, and after one song is sung by both Hammond inflicts a monologue which for antiquity has everything stopped. If that mono- logue is cut way down, and more atten- tion given to the rest, they will do a great deal better. Gillette's Musical Dogs made a big hit, and Mr. Gillette has a lot of ani- mals better trained than those any for- eign act has yet shown here. J. Francis Wood opened the show. Mr. Wood rolls hoops. CIRCLE. A burlesque show at the Circle must "clean up" before playing this house. Regardless of what is said or done "on the road" there are too many women and children attending the matinees here for a chance to be taken. J. Herbert Mack's World Beaters are the bill this week, and there is not a line or piece of "business" connected with it even remotely suggestive. The nearest approach is when Major Casper Nowak, a dwarf, told by a girl that he is "too small," replies: "Well, what there is of me I can highly recommend." This same line when spoken by Mark Murphy in vaudeville is passed by, but the "Major" secures a laugh out of it be- cause it is said in a burlesque show. The girls are young, better looking than the average, and the only missing quantity or quality is comedians. The company is decidedly without them. Everyone in the olio doubles up in the burlesque, and the present comedians, Mike McDonald and Phil McFartand, are required to turn out and invent every old sort of an excuse for a laugh that can be thought of. 0 The "seltzer bottle," the "echo" and the see-saw bench are all made to do service" in the final piece, which affords, however, May Gebhardt and May Corey the opportunity of "showing their shapes." The "shapes" take up a great deal of stage space, and evoke whistles and calls of admiration from the younger generation. The opening number, "Jolly Old Sports," is given for the purpose of dis- playing the girls' costumes, which are not expensive. The girls mareR to the tune of "Yankee Doodle Dandy" and the discrepancies in the alignment seem to have passed notice. A small girl holds up one end of the row, while at the other is an amazon. Between, the short and tall ones are mixed. In the olio the sisters DeForest sing three songs and show three dance steps. McFarland and McDonald also appear with the seltzer bottle, and German and Irish attempted comedy intermingled. About this time you laugh in sheer dis- gust, but Bohannon and Corey kill all chances of a continued smile with illus- trated songs. Either one must close one's eyes or see the pictures. Miss Corey's voice must be listened to. In order that the audience may be aware a woman is singing the spot on which she stands is lighted up. It is darkened immediately after, and you hope, but no, she appears in a soldier's uniform, and sings some more. Quigg, Edwards and Nickerson play "The Palms" on musical instruments, and have several such, of which the chimes oarry off the honors for steely tones. Niblo and Spencer in "Artistic Dancing Exercises" may rest on the bill- ing, while the moving pictures are the best of the whole show. There Is no dash, the action just plods along. What is needed is "a" comedian or comedians, and a stage manager with some idea of humor which hasn't been stored up in his "thinkery" since he visited his first burlesque show or saw an afterpiece. HURTIG 6 SEAMON'S. It was eight-forty Monday night when the curtain was raised for the com- mencement of the evening entertain- ment, and it fell again at eleven-twenty. During the interval twenty-two minutes were allowed "for refreshments." De- ducting the time of two overtures for "waits" and the moving pictures, left two hours for eight acts to amuse. The program man had "bailed up" the billing, and the first wait was undoubt- edly occasioned through an attempt to iearrange the bill after the matinee. Another mistake was the spelling of Stephen Grattan's surname as "Bratton." Mr. Grattan and Maud White appeared in "Locked Out at 3 A. M.," which has been "touted" several times in a morn- ing newspaper as a new sketch. It is old, very old, and since its first appear- ance about four years ago, both the principals have played in the legitimate, from whence they came. Their return to vaudeville is the answer. The least that could have been expected was something new. Lind, a female impersonator, was the star of the show. There is no other similar impersonator that classes with him. Not one-tenth of the audience had an inkling of his identity until at the finale he removed the wig, which, inci- dentally, is a very poor one. The "buzz" following lasted several moments, Mr. Lind taking four curtain calls. Almost lightning changes are made, each per- fect in itself, and to properly appre- ciate this artist he must be seen. McMahon's Minstrel Maids made a solid hit. No one is starred. Each girl has something to do, and the act is far superior to any other of like nature. Miss Sully, the interlocutor, has a good voice, wkh a clear enunciation. The Barrett Sisttrs are the end "men" and have a song and dance. Annie Donald- son sings a ballad in a sweet soprano, while Miriam Carson has a rattling inarch song into which she infuses lots of spirit and enthusiasm in the render- ing, besides being the prettiest of the lot, although a couple of others look quite pretty bene^h the brown. "The Mobile Quartette" is composed of the balance of the girls, having one song which they would have still been sing- ing had the verses held out. The sec- ond scene is well set. „This is a return date within a month here. Gorman and West, in a sketch called "A Special Meeting," spoil the idea of a "sketch" by opening In a song and dance. Miss West is one of the best dressed women on the vaudeville stage, and there is no reason why this team should not advance if they will exercise judgment in the selection of material. Something new and better should be procured at once. Miss West should examine her stockings carefully before eaoh performance. Mickey and Nelson amused a holiday house greatly, as did Foster and Foster. This last team made an undoubted hit with the songs and piano playing. The better placed they are on a bill the larger the hit. There is no getting away from it, a! f hough the reason Is not evl- THE OFFICE BOY AND THE MAN- AGERS. "Sh, walk on your toes," said the Office Boy as I opened the door of the agent's office, "there's a Manager inside with the Boss." "Well, supposing?" I replied, not deeming a Manager the Supreme Idol of the Earth. "Back," says the Boy. "Excuse me If I talk in a whisper while he's around. I can easily dope out you don't know what a real cheese a Manager is. "You ought to know them the way I do," he continued in a low voice. "In vaudeville it's the Manager. Always the Manager. Maybe the agent is looked up to once in a while, but when *tirs Manager is around everybody shrinks. "Listen and I'll hand you a few real ones about Managers. Most of them don't know they're alive. They have to keep still while the artists are around or the real workers would find them out. A artist goes to an agent and asks if Mr. So and So can't use his new act, and when it gets to Mr. So and So, he says, the wise guy, 'Where has it played?' and 'Is.it full of comedy?' and when the agent says 'It's a new act of hisn,' Mr. Manager pulls his mustache and says 'You know our audiences. We can't take a chance. I know just what they want and I must know all about the act first before I take it. You had better get them to play somewheres first and see how it goes.' "It would make you dizzy. If the Man- ager knew enough to know his audience he would have been In some other busi- ness besides vaudeville. Vaudeville has been a God-send for most of them any- way. They fell into it, and are scared to death all the time that they will have to fall out. If a Manager can beat a act down $25, $50 or $100, he pats him- self on the back and when he goes to sleep that, night, pulls the bedclothes over his head so that the pictures on the ceiling can't, see what a great man he is. "When you find a real Manager he is so busy thinking up combinations how to 1 trim the others in the business that be neglects his own shows. "They will come into the city on a Monday or Tuesday from 200 or 300 miles away so as to say that they book their own shows and when they leave town they have to hire an expert ac- countant to find out how much they have been trimmed. "Its a funny business, as I said before, and If the Managers knew as much as they think they do about It, they'd all make money. Everybody in the country now who's got a theatre what they don't know what to do with has turned it into a vaudeville house. "Turn your back. Here he comes out. You musn't look, you know, for there may be a job on and you could get a line on it. Skip out quick now before the Uoss sees you." dent. The La Vine Cimaron Trio ap- peared, as did Mosher, Houghton and Mosher, who were handicapped in bi- cycle riding by the size of the stage.