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APRIL 1901 203 ( Continued from page one ninety-jive') graph Buoy ! The Typewriter Dream would make letter writing simplicity itself. Hasten, O Oshkosh One, the fulfillment of thy prophecy! And the Fire Alarm Dream would be worth untold millions to the underwriters. Mosey! and quickly too, O Western Fire Chief! And so also is it with other Who-has-ever-heards that shall fol- low, in coming numbers of The Phonogram; of all, a good word may be said. Of none do I wish to decry the tentative value. ’Twould be both rash and unkind. Had I lived in the times of Elias Howe, how bitter would be my retrospect in these days of sewing machines for the millions, had I published a squib “Who has even heard of a machine needle, ’ ’ and had held it up to ridicule ? Or suppose I had jollied Eli Whitney about his cotton gin, or Burt and his writing machine, or joshed S. F. B. Morse with an article “Who has ever heard of a wire that talked;*’ or Theodore Timby about his revolving turret, or McCormick and his reaper or Fulton or Stephenson or any one of the scores of inventors who dreamt their dreams and perfected them ? Rather let the reader of my Who- has-ever-heards look upon them as mild sarcasms on the tendency of the age to go off at half cock as the saying is, or as gentle satires on the fallacy of rushing into print. Therefore, gentle reader, should a dream be dreamt, ponder it well and long and privily before telling the world. You all dream dreams; some that are, already, some that have been and some that will be. Have a care ! Your dream may be a will-be and perhaps good one. It is not given to all to be great inventors. ’ Twould be a sorry world if such were so. But, on the possibility that yours may be the name that lives in the twenty hundreds by reason of