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“ We ghall simply have to move, ** No,” said the Lieutenant, 4 that, to-morrow there will be a rah It takes only Half an Eye to recognise the superiority of genuine Edison Phonographs; they are made with accuracy and precision , to uphold the Fame of the Name of the Man who stands behind them .— Ofenekr. THE PARROT AND THE PHONOGRAPH By W. H. Sedgwick The family next door was the proud possessor of a parrot of unusual intelligence, which had a marvelous aptitude in learning popular songs, singing them at the most inoppor- tune times and places. The parrot’s pet aversion was an old Doctor, who called professionally at the house, and who had a habit of blowing his nose like a trumpet’s blast in front of Polly* s cage whenever he entered or left the house. Polly stood the infliction patiently, as long as a self respect- ing parrot could reasonably be expected to endure such treatment, and then by the way of retaliation began to make comments upon the old fellow’s style, manner, and general appearance ; not at all complimentary you may be sure, but showing great penetration on Polly’s part. One morning, while making a call, on entering the house the Doctor stopped in front of the cage and blew the usual salute. Polly looked at him for a moment in disgust, and then calmly said, ** You poor damfool, why don’t you bore holes in your nose and play it like a flute.” It is needless to say he did not torment the bird any more.