Actorviews (1923)

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Miss Moores and Her Mamma 157 “So one night when mother and I were dining with Mr. Hodge at a table right near Mr. Courtenay’s, Mr. Hodge began behaving in the strangest manner. We were eating squabs; and Mr. Hodge would take the small bones from his squab and put them behind his ears, like lead pencils.” “My dear child! What if Mr. Hodge should see this terrible story in print!” “I don’t care if he does! He did stick the bones of that squab behind his ears. He did more. He picked up the whole bird and rubbed his chin with it.” “Don’t listen to her, Mr. Stevens !” “And then he said, ‘I’ll make Mr. William Courtenay think it’s fine company you keep !’ ” “My God!” said mamma. “Yes, it’s nice to have your mother with you,” Miss Moores was saying as I left. “When you feel sad and depressed, it’s nice to have her take you in her arms and tuck you in your bed. I’m still a baby — big, but still a baby — and I don’t know what I’d do without her.” And when I went home that night to get tucked in, I said: “It’s always the same. I go into a mothered interview cursing the mother, and I come out blessing her and wondering what I should have done for a story without her.” “Oh, there are much worse things than mothers,” said mine.