Boy's Cinema (1930-31)

12 "Piescnt for your girl, ch ? You got a girl?" "Sure I liavc, Bilge," replied Joncsy. " iVlct licr last week. She's a real good- looker. I bought her some silk stockings for a present, and I'm off to her place right now." "Has your girl got a sister who wouldn't mind walking out with mo?" asked Bilge wistfully, surveying his tubby figure with considerable disgust. "Huh!" snorted Jonesy scornfully. "My girl thiiiks I'm a big oil man from Oklahoma. "Vou keep off; you njight spill the beans!" Joncsy sprinted off, leaving Bilge s:taring dismally after him. "Guess I'll have a woman tattooed on me," he growled. "That's all I'm ever likely to get, I reckon." Meanwhile Jonesy had turned into a garage to hire a car for the day. Get- ting into it, he drove away and out of the town for some miles until ho came to a fair-sized house in the country. Here he got out and walked up to the door. A burly, rufliauly-Iooking fellow jinswered his knock. "Er^does Lctitia live here?" he mur- mured, taken aback by the ficrco glare (lie man cast upon him. "Yes; she is my wife!" growled the icilow angrily. iJoncsy had mot the fair Letitia only once, and he had no idea who she really was. He edged away from the trucu- lent individual before him, and then a brilliant idea came into his mind. "Can I interest you in sonie silk stock- ings?" ho remarked persuasively. "Not so much as you have interested me in this," shouted the man, producing a telegram. "Your name's Jones, I reckon. You sent this to my wife to say you were calling this evening, and now I'm going to bust you up till you can't stand !" Discretion was undoubtedly the better part of valour at the moment. Leaving the question of the silk stockings, Jonesy began an immediate strategic retreat. He turned and bolted for the car at the top of 'his speed, followed by the indig- nant husband of the deceitful Letitia, breathing threats and slaughter. Reach- ing the car thirty yards ahead, Jonesy sprang in, and got her going in record time. He slid away just as the man made an inefVectual grab at the back of the car, and in another moment the un- lucky sailor was driving down the road at a furious pace, well out of the reach of pursuit. "And I told Bilge I'd got a girl!" he muttered as he drove along. "I've done with women ! I'd' better stick to old Bilge after thie." Another car, driven by a well-dressed young man of about his own age, ranged up alongside. Jones stepped on the gas, and forged ahead, but not for long. The other driver accelerated, too, and soon the cars were racing furiously side by side. Joncsy was not a very ex- perienced driver, and he missed a collis- sion by the narrowest margin as ho strove to outdistance the other car. Presently lie managed to get a little aiiead, and turned to grin at his rival. The next second the car hit a barrier that stretched across the road, and the steering-wheel was jerked out of Jonesy's hand. The car slewed across the road to tlie gateway of a house on the other side, smashed through the gate, and overturned in the garden. The other motorist pulled up, got out, and went to help. Ho approached the overturned car, and jieered beneath it for the dead body of the driver, but in vain. Wafking round to tlie other side, he observed Jonesy stretdied flat on the ground under a, tree, quite motionless, but with a cigarette still stuck in hi.s mouth. He went up to the prone figure, Jul; nth, 1931. BOY'S CINEMA expecting to find that the reckless fellow was badly injured, if not dead, but as he approached Jonesy sat up. "Ginmic a light, pal!" cried the sailor cheerfully. "My cigarette's gone out, I've lost my girl and I've busted the car. But John Jones, the oil ex- pert from South America, is okay— sure !" The Millionaire from Brazil. THE young fellow who had been racing with Jonesy was a gay blade from the town, Edward Watkins by name, though most of his friends never called him anything but ■' What-Ho!" He surveyed the non- cl-.alant Joncsy with a grin as the sailor rose to his feet, but his amusement immediately turned to surprise. Jonesy's first action was to pick up a big stone and hurl it straight at a statue of the goddess Vomis which stood in the garden. Ciash! And a piece of the arm flew into the air. Another stone, and Venus was deprived of her head! "What's the idea, boy?" asked AVhat- Ho in amazement as Jonesy stooped to find another stone. "I'm not going mad, if that's what j-ou mean," cried Joncsy airily. "I'm u woman-hater, that's all. Here goes!" " So am I!" exclaimed What-Ho, seizing a lump of lock and throwing it ut the statue. In two minutes there was nothing left of the goddess of beauty, and the young men paused to take breath. "That's what I should like to do to all these cheap dames one meets," said Joncsy. "I guess I feel better now." ■■ You come up to my place, boy, and just clean yourself up and have a rest," said What-Ho heartily. "Never mind the old car. We'll send someone from town to collect the pieces." 'Thanks," said Jonesy. "I'll sure come, Mr.-;-:—"" • ' " ■: " Aw, shucks, don't call me ' Mister '! My name's Watkins, but my pals seem to reckon it's What-Ho. Hop in my car, and I'll step on it." W'hat-Ho stepped on it to such pur- pose that in a few minutes his car drew up outside a fine mansion on the out- skirts of the town. Jonesy looked at the house, and then at his new acquaintance. " Say, What-Ho, is this your house ?" he asked dubiously. " Sure it's my house," laughed his companion. "Come right in." Jonesy, not without some inward tremors, stepped right in, and found himself in the most palatial residence he had ever seen. What-Ho led him upstairs to his dressing-room, and told him that there was a swell party that evening. "You stop, boy, and I'll fit you up right," said the good-natured Watkins. "You're just about my size, and I've got more dress suits than I know what to do with. Let's hurry up and give them a treat." They hurried up, and soon Jonesy, clad in evening dress, was sun'oying himself in a glass. "GcH)d-evening, I'm pleased to meet you!" he remarKed, smiling to his own reflection. " Come on, big boy!" cried What-Ho, and the pair went downstairs together, until half-way down they met a lady. "Hallo, here's auntie!" exclaimed Jonesy's new pal jovially. "Auntie, meet my friend Jones, big oil man from South America. Brazil, I believe. Jones, kiss auntie!" Jones did not go quite so far as to kiss auntie, but he shook hands cordially with the lady, trying hard to feel that he really was an oil magnate from Brazil. ' Every Tuesday "You boys go down and give the folks a surprise," said auntie, and down into the ball-ixjom they went. The room was full of men and women dancing, and the first persons whom Jonesy noticed were two of the oflBcers of the flagship. His first impulse was to bolt before they saw him, but he reflected that though he knew them by sight, it was highly impi-obable that they would re- cognise a sailor from the oil-tanker, 31)3 he accompanied What-Ho across the room coolly enough. " There's Mary Lou!" cried his host eagerly. "Come and meet her, Jones." " Thought you were a woman-hater," remarked the sailor surpriscdlj'. " So I am. She's why. Hallo, Mary Lou! This is my pal fram Brazil, Mr. Jones." Jonesy pulled himself , togethei; and bowed politely to a pretty girl with light fluffy hair, who looked past him and smiled at W^hat-Ho. "Yes, he's in oil," continued What-Ho, as a beautiful little lady, with lovely dark hair and a bewitching smile, came up' with her dance partner. "Hallo, here's Klit!" Jonesy looked at Kit, and his fate was sealed. He fell for her then and there. Mary Lou was well enough, but to his mind she was not in the same state ■yvith the chaixning newcomelr. " Meet my friend Jones, Kit," boomed What-Ho. "Oil millionaire from ^Brazil. Jones, meet Kit and Lieutenant Michael of the Colorado—we call hini Mike, of course." , "May I have the next dailce, please'?" said Jonesy to Kit. ' ')<■'^• "You must ask my partner," replied' the girf, indicating t"he lieutenant, who was regarding the young sailor with anything but a cheery eye. "I want to dance the next with this lady," said Jones, quailing inwardly, but putting a bold face on the niattcr. " Do« you mind ?" ■■•>'J'. "Of course I mind!" snorted the lieutenant. "This lady is niy partner." And he swung Kit away, leaving Jones stranded helplessly in the corner until What-Ho left Alary Lou and came over to him. "What's the matter, Jones?" " Nothing!" said the young sailor shortly. " My girl has gone off with that officer fellow, that's all." "Your girl, eh?" laughed What-Ho. "I'll say you've got some nerve. Do you know that she is Why, there's some stiff making off with Mary Lou! I'll get her back. You watch me." He rushed off, slapped Mary Lou's partner on the back, and, as the startled man turned round, What-Ho seized the girl and danced off with her. Jonesy followed his example, and managed to detach Kit fiofn the lieutenant. "I think you're swell!" remarked Jonesy as he danced round the room. "Do you?" said Kit softly. She rather liked this bold young stranger with his handsome face and his air of recklessness, and she gave him a shy glance from under her dark eye- lashes. That looked finished Joncsy completely, in spite of his resolution to have done with women. "Yes, 1 do," he replied in a voice that actually trembled. " Say, are you engaged to that officer?" "Lieutenant Michael? I (lo'i't know why you should ask," said Kit. " But if you want to know, I'm not, not really, though my father wants me to be." " Well, you're not going to be," stated Jonesy firmly. "I want you." Kit laughed, and a heavy hand fell on Jonesy's shoulder. He started con- vulsively, and the lieutenant snatched Kit from Ji''P» .„