Close Up (Oct 1920 - Aug 1923)

16 Bright Hints For Human Beings By “US” or “WE” ute of the festivities. It remained for Mr. Ben Wilson to carry out a long cherished wish of reducing in a normal way some of his accumulated avoirdupois. He claims that he lost at least five ounces during five hours, in fact, he had his arms around every feminine waist in the gathering before he departed; nor let it be said that Jessie McAllister was lacking for partners, for when she wasn’t terpsichoring, she was busily engaged cranking up the Angelus! She became so familiar at one time as to actually admit that she was enjoying herself to the limit — anyway, she looked stunning, and one only regretted that this charming lady had been lost forever to the stage. Mr. Emile, and his more than charming wife, finally arrived— much to the gratification of myself. His exquisite joviality and general demeanor made him a favorite with the gathering. Naturally, it would net have been Miss Dale Fuller if she hadn’t perpetrated some extraordinary amusement. She seems to have mortgaged every bit of originality not cornered by the scenario artists. At one time I actually caught her surrounded by nine or ten ladies, all deeply interested in something she was telling them. I afterwards found out that she hadn’t been telling the story of her life, but her only fault — as far as I could see, was that she did not buy more than three gallons of gas for (Nellie) at a time, and that aforesaid Nellie has a peculiar penchant of running out of gas at the most inopportune time, much to the disgust of “Yours Truly.” Mr. and Mrs. Hafer came in at an opportune time and all the ladies present were of one opinion (and this is a very high compliment) that they had never seen such an exquisite complexion as Mrs. Hafer possesses. Miss Jean Calhoun, who resembled a little piece of Dresden china, or a setting in an old rose garden, made a tremendous impression upon everyone present with her refinement and ethereal beauty. Olga Gorden, who just arriyed from New York, seemed like a little cameo out of a setting of an antique ring, while Lois Rosen captivated everyone with her vampish attire and her modest demeanor. There were others present but space will have to excuse the lack of mentioning them at this writing, but I might state in conclusion that the gracious hostess, Kathrine Lorimer, received the surprise of her life when at 8:30 on the evening of the 13th (twelve hours after the last guest had gone), Lee Moran, one of the invited guests, phoned in “to know at what time the party started?” So it is very evident that several guests including Jack Mower, must have mistaken the day and wasted the night before. A great deal of thanks is due the charming hostess for her efforts in making this birthday party the success that it was, and I am hoping, personally, that on my next cycle birthday, which will occur five years hence, I will have the pleasure cf having all of these same good friends attend and surround me with their manifestations of cordiality, as they did until the last departed greeting at 6 a. m. on the 13th of August, 1922. P. S. : Fortunately, when the birthday cake was cut, on which was inscribed “Marshall’s Birthday,” and a question mark in which One Candle was stuck, no one present received any harbingers of living in single blessedness for the balance of their lives, so when this invitation is renewed, it’s a foregone conclusion to believe that I will be inviting the various misses as Mrs. So-and-So at that time. P.P.S. : Everybody went home dizzily happy!! A 20TH CENTURY COURTSHIP “In Ole Lunnon Town” By Marshall Lorimer Fate started them upon the way From opposite directions, Both wending at the close of day Toward their home affections. She had been shopping, tea-ing, and Sight-seeing in the city, While he, all day had been quite bland In Anti-Vice Committee. Their ages might have differed some, But both their years well carried! They wore the look of snug income, Yet each was still unmarried! They met as Fate intended them, Just in the city’s center, When, Presto! Cupid took the helm; Was ever such tormenter? The Imp their meeting brought about, (And here began the trouble) By putting their esteem to rout In manner somewhat novel! Each thought their progress rather slow, So hailed a cab at random, And when it came, both tried to go Into the self-same hansom! Indignantly with face aflame, She prior rights asserted, But he, as stubborn did the same — So each to terms reverted. The Jehu up above meanwhile, Worn out by their discussion, Whipped up his pony (with a smile) Which brought about concussion! Into each others arms they fell, In most diverting tangle, They drew apart, Love wove its spell! They e’en forgot their wrangle! Thus introduced they soon found out They long had been close neighbors, (Which goes to prove beyond a doubt,) (That these were Cupid’s capers?) Their hearts enshrined the little elf, They saw life with new meaning, They’d found a richer thing than Pelf, Undreamed of in their dreaming. So interested had they been In Psychic contemplation, That they were not aware the scene Was their own destination. Till he, the Tool who shaped their ends, Said “he could eat his supper”; Which spread confusion, tho’ amends, Was not this just and proper? And as the Jehu drove away, With gold in pocket jingling, They knew their gifts could ne’er repay The tune their hearts were singing. PLEASE PATRONIZ E— W HO ADVERTIS E— I N “CLOSE-UP