Film Fun (Jan - Dec 1919)

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29 Children of the Studios (Continued from page 9) The casting director looked around for a moment. Then he pronounced the sentence. "Is Mrs. Hackensack here to-day?" asked the casting director. "Yes, sir," answered a buxom female. "Is Cleopatra with you?" asked the casting director. "Yes, sir," answered the buxom female. "Well, bring her into my office. Nothing for anybody else. Come again Wednesday. ' ' Mrs. Hackensack and her little daughter pushed their way into the inner office, and the rest of us pushed our way into the street. Mrs. Hackensack wore a triumphant smirk. The rest of us wore disgusted frowns. "Kids! Kids! Kids!" snapped an old man. "The directors don't want people who can act. They don't want people with stage experience. They only want brats who can look 'cute' and 'cunning.' It makes me sick!" "If this sort of thing keeps up, I'll have to get another job!" snarled another old man. "I've only had one day's work in a week. I used to work every day, as a doctor, a lawyer, a banker or a burglar. But kids are the fashion, gosh blame 'em!" On the sidewalk I passed the two mothers and the two children. "That Hackensack woman is a nasty, common creature, with her rhinestone combs and her soiled gloves!" said Mrs. Le Roy. "Did you notice how her waist was ripped in the seams and how her skirt sagged in the back? I'd be ashamed to appear in public so sloppy and slouchy!" said Mrs. St. Clair. ' ' As for that youngster of hers — Cleopatra ! The name used to be Bridget, and the face is Bridget still ! Did you ever see such a turned-up nose on a child? It is positively pathetic!" "And so up stage and conceited! She won't even speak to Angeline! The other day, at the Scandalous, Angeline smiled real pleasant and said 'Hullo!' real ladylike, and Cleopatra said, 'Go away and mind your own business! You are only an extra child, but I play leading parts!' I could have slapped her ugly little face for her!" "How could the child have manners When the mother hasn't any herself? If I do say it as shouldn c, my child is always polite and refined." "So is mine. I never have to scold or correct her. She is always perfectly— Why, children, what are you quarreling about?" ' ' Boo-hoo ! Gwendolen pinched me ! She called me a liar!" "Boo-hoo! Angeline kicked me! She called me a devil!" Having heard enough, I beat a hasty retreat. Why Can't I Be a Hero? (Continued from page 2%) incapacity for strong drink. I remember one night in Mexico when I was particularly troubled about things. I had killed a banker, and things looked very bad for me. The next morning I must explain to his widowed mother. Just before the Crossbones Bar closed for the night, I bought a gallon and a half of their most potent whiskey and asked permission of the bartender to stand at the bar and drink all night, so that dawn would find me there at the bar with bowed head and an empty whiskey bottle at my finger tips — repentant, clear-headed, in fine fettle to meet the banker's mother and make an explanation. But the clock struck twelve-thirty, one, one-thirty — and that is the last I remember. I fell sound asleep and slept right through my appointment with the banker's mother and never did see her. And that's the way my life is. It's a darn dull life. I don't see why I can't be a hero. If I could just be wounded — just once — and never know it for a couple of weeks, and then have somebody else call my attention to the fact, preferably a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful girl, who, appreciating my nonchalance, would silhouette me to her bosom in the moonlight or ride with me on horseback across the desert out of sight of the eye ! Stumped Location Man — I'll produce any location you desire. Director — All right. Reserve the golden street in heaven for next Wednesday. ' Mean Friend — Animal pictures seem to have gone out of style. Has your company ^ot any wild animals? Actress — Only the directors. Rest Assured Fault! Pajamas and Night Shirts mean the originality. ,of everything in material, style and manufacture that is worthy, at a price which gives maximum value to the wearer. Over 10,000 dealers recommend — " The NICHTwear of a Nation! " FRECKLES Now Is the Time to Get Rid of These Ugly Spots. There's no longer the slightest need of feeling ashamed of your freckles, as Othine — double strength — is guaranteed to remove these homely spots. Simply get an ounce of Othine— double strength — from your druggist, and apply a little of it night and morning and you should soon see that even the worst freckles have begun to disappear, while the lighter ones have vanished entirely. It is seldom that more than one ounce is needed to completely clear the skin and gain a beautiful clear complexion. Be sure to ask for the double strength Othine, as this is sold under guarantee of money back if it fails to remove freckles. BIG VALUE for 10 Gfs. 6 Popular Songs, words and music; 25 Pictures Pretty Girls 40 Ways to . Make Money ; 1 Joke Book ; 1 Book on Love ;1 Magic Book; 1 Book Letter Writing; 1 Dream Book and Fortune Teller; 1 Cook Book; 1 Base Ball Book, gives rules for games; 1 Book White Slaves of N. Y.; 1 Toy Maker Book; Language of Flowers1 Morse Telegraph Alphabet; 12 Chemical Experiments; Magic Age Table; Great North Pole Game; 100 Conundrums; 3 Puzzles; 12 Games; 30 Verses for Autograph Albums. All the above by mail for 10 cents and !8 cents postage. ROYAL SALES CO., Box 10, South Norwalk, Ct. Throw™,,. VOICE into the cellar. Under the bed or anywhere. TheVentrilo which fits into the mouth, will enabla you to fool all your friends, "f ft /vtc by mail. *w *'la with instructions. ARHEE Pub. Co. Box B Stamford Conn Comics, Cartoons, Commercial, Newspaper and Magazine Illustrating. Pastel Crayon Portraits and Fashions. By Mailor Local Classes. Write for terms and list of successful students. Associated Art Studios, 4-A Flatiron Building. New York CHALK-TALK Program, complete, $1.00 Satisfaction guaranteed— Particulars free CLYDE TRUMAN, Box "C," Perrysville, Ohio PHOTOPLAYS WANTED Big prices paid. You can write them We ihow you how. Rex Publishers, Box 175, C-15, Chicago. &