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From under my Hat
I was terrified of deep water. My dear sister Dora had taken care of that. When I was young she elected to teach me to swim in the Juniata River. With my middle draped over a plank, she held onto my rear end. Somebody tripped her, she fell on top of me, and we went to the bottom. She got herself out; I came up gulping. I'm an expert swimmer today, as long as one foot's on the bottom. In deep water I'm as much good as a bluebird in a goldfish bowl.
When I told this to Farnum he hired three deep-sea divers from Catalina to come along and protect me. He assured me there was no danger.
Oscar Apfel stood on an improvised railing to direct a scene in which I was to dive off the ship. He said, "Now when I say, 'Camera!' you count three, then dive. I'll save you." Oscar yelled, "Camera!" the railing broke, he fell backward into the Pacific and came up with a baby octopus round his arm.
That killed any plans he had for me to dive overboard. Nevertheless I did have to hang onto a stout piece of driftwood, supposedly in mid-Pacific, and wave one arm while screaming for help. Hidden out of camera range under my log was a husky diver. He stayed by me till the bitter end. That picture nearly ended me; I lost thirtyfive pounds.
Watching kids today who have everything done for them— doubles for danger, every sort of device to make them look good without any risk to themselves— I marvel that any silent star ever survived to tell about it.
When I saw Don Quixote on the screen I knew Wolfie would never have success in pictures. He was too old, and this medium too young for him.
When his year's contract was up and it was time for him to return to New York, he insisted on motoring. It would be difficult to bundle son Bill, his nurse Nannie, and me into a new car for a cross-country ride. Besides, at that time there was an epidemic of some contagious disease and it was dangerous for children to travel. Wolfie decided that Bill, Nannie, and I should stay in California until the epidemic abated and join him later at tfie Algonquin.
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