International photographer (Jan-Dec 1935)

CINEMACARONI " By ROBERT TOBEY HOLLYWOOD HONEYMOON of a thousand and one nights in a daze) By R. THRITIS Synopsis of preceding chapters^ Perriwether Murgle, press-agent for the lovely screen star, Lili Liverblossom, is in a pickle, a very large pickle, just big enough to contain him. Tie lias been carried off to the aerie of a huge Bald Eagle named Willy Nilly. Here the Eagle's wife, Nelly Nilly, makes googly eyes at Perri. Meanwhile, /-. L, has engineered the loan of a ghost to help liri in rescuing Murgle. As we pick up the tale, Lili's friend Bill, has just sent the ghost over to her apartment, and I. Hi looks up from her chair to see at her window — nothing! With that intuition cornmankind, she knows it is the ghost CHAPTER XIV. Party and Repartee Scarcely believing her eyes, Lili staggered to the ■window. "How — how do you do?" she stammered. I'll clo — close the window so you can come in." As Lili watched him, the ghost slowly passed through the heavy wall beside the window, and stood at attention by the mantel-piece. "How amazing!" exclaimed Lili. A grin broke out on the ghost's face. "You ain't seen nothin', kid," he said in a slow sepulchral voice. "Wait till you see the rest of my bag of tricks." And he jumped a little and clicked his heels with an inaudible click. "How amazing," repeated Lili, at a loss for anything better to say. "Won't you sit down?" Lili finally said, hesitantly. "I want you to make yourself at home. Well, not exactly that," she added hastily. "What good would it do me to sit down?" asked the ghost in his deep voice. "I don't touch anything, you know. If I let myself go I'd fall right through the chair. I might just as well stand up." For the first time Lili realized she could see the wall behind the ghost, just as if he weren't there, and while his feet seemed to be resting on the floor, they weren't resting on the floor, and yet there they were, although they weren't there. It was all too confusing, thought Lili. "Can I get you a drink, then?" asked Lili, speaking once for the ghost and twice for herself. "Can I get you a drink? Can I get you a drink? It's a cold night." "Skip it," said the ghost hollowly. "It wouldn't warm me up a bit. There's nothing to keep it inside me, you see. I'm thinking of having a glass stomach built in, though," he added thoughtfully. "Cripes," said Lili, "but you're a problem. Won't you try sitting down? You make me so nervous just standing there." "Anything to help out," said the ghost, jumping and clicking his heels again. He eased himself carefully into the nearest chair. The cat was lying on it. The cat didn't move. But her hairs stood up like soldiers. Each one saluted. Settling himself comfortably, the ghost spoke again. "I'm really a gay fellow," he said confidentially. "I have a heck of a lot of fun. There are so many tricks I can play without people knowing it." Then he added apologetically, "I'm sorry I have to talk in this awful voice, but all of us ghosts do. It's part of our unhappy lot." He fell silent for a moment. "I wish I had a piece of chain to clank," he said wistfully. "Haven't you even a small bit of old chain about the house?" "Nope. All the plumbing is modern," said Lili. "The only thing I might have around is a piece of an old daisy chain from Vassar." "Did you go to Vassar?" inquired the ghost. "Sure. In one of my first pictures, 'The Perils of a College Girl.' I played the college girl," said Lili. "I played the director, too," she reminisced, as she started for the next room to look for the daisy chain. In a moment she -was back, carrying a jingling slave bracelet all set -with emeralds and diamonds. "Here you are!" she cried. "Isn't it a daisy?" The ghost seized it with trembling fingers. Instantly he was himself again. "My only real vice," he explained apologetically, rattling the bracelet gleefully. "And now to the rescue," said Lili. {How will they reach Perri, in the Eagle's at And will they he able to save him from his lute. perhaps a fate worse than death? Write or your nearest Senator. And see next month'i for the reply.) (With, sauce for those who like it.) QUIET SPECULATION DEPARTMENT According to the dispatches from Washington (the place the President leaves to board his yacht), the Department of Agriculture is engaged in a research project with its goal the development of a new and different strain of turkeys, a kind with a shape that will better "fit into the limited oven of the present-day apartment kitchen." A noble, altruistic experiment , this breeding of square turkeys to fit into modern, ovens. The next step will be to breed people that can fit into breakfast nooks. And then they might apply themselves to the breeding of plots that will fit into censors' minds. * * * May we suggest the employment of the principle of capillarity? POLIT SURPRISE DEPT. Here's -chat a hyphen did to the listing of the bit players on a motion picture call sheet. it was a typist's revenge; -elm kn, "Walter and Bill; 2-bit politicians." KNEECAP REVIEWS (/ have my thumb in my mouth) "METROPOLITAN" with Lawrence Tibbett. (Without Lawrence Tibbett, nothing.) A weak story, done a hundred times before; but if you like Tibbett, don't let anyone talk you out of seeing this. To every song he sings he gives the Tibbett all. There is no more than that. Unfortunately, "On The Road to Mandalay," which Tibbett sings superlatively, comes early in the picture, and he never tops it, as who could; and his final song, the Prologue from "Pagliacci," is colorless, too long drawn out, and poorly cut, thus leaving one with a slight taste of cotton in the mouth. Richard Boleslavski directed with far less than his usual masterly touch; perhaps the trite story ■was entirely to blame. Virginia Bruce, plenty lovely, is never as lovely on the screen as off. She mostly sings; and since she sings with another's voice, it really was scarcely the role for her. I'm told that Lily Pons was asked to dub her voice in as Bruce's. She didn't, though. Tut, tut! George Marion Sr. and Alice Brady gave two superb performances (just one apiece.) ,, chestnut j up nut of filmdom's /'«>' Given th and mellow has-been to put on the (or maybe he chose it). Directed Henry King stuck his tongue in his check and kept it there all through the making of the pi lure. Many old lines lucre deftly made to hold a modern punch. The audience with whom I saw it got a lot of enjoyment out of the result. The villain -,eas hiss,', I and our side was lustily cheered. All the character 'ell portrayed ami in quite the proper spirit. Those taking bows at this time are Henry Fonda, Rochelle Hudson. Slim Summer-■Hie, P.dward Trevor. Russell Simpson. Spring Byington, Andy He-vine. Sara Hadden. and Astrid Allwyn. Photography by Ernest Palmer was excellent. "BARBARY COAST." One of the most interest-''' ing of the costume pictures, because -it not only deals in old clothes, but covers a colorful and thrilling episode in the American past. Miriam Hopkins unpacked her bag on Sam Goldwyn's time and there were all her Becky Sharp tricks, as good as new. All she had to do was learn to spin a roulette wheel. She does her work well, as does Joel McCrea. Edward G. Robinson is so fine in his performance • of the part of Louis Chamalis, the boss of San Francisco, that he actually makes you believe his final renunciation scenes. The photography of the picture, in the hands of Ray June, is superb. A difficult picture to photograph, it was excellently conveyed to the screen, the fog effects being especially noteworthy. "HANDS ACROSS THE TABLE." And if they're reaching for my money, they can have it, for this picture is a nifty. Rollicking good fun from start' to finish, the story has some angles which are either brand spanking new or else are polished to a fare-thee-well. The dialogue, credited chiefly to Norman Krasna, sparkles like champagne, direction is flawless, the photography is impeccable, the histrionics are matchless — oh, come, come! Carole Lombard is ideal as a shrewd and lovely manicurist whose avowed matrimonial heartlessness crumbles before Love, in the person of one Fred McMurray, who positively scintillates with charm and gayety in this here now cellu$6medy. Ralph Bellamy rounds off a perfect trio as a wealthy young cripple who takes an interest in the frank and saucy young polisher-upper. No wonder Lombard cries for Teddy Tetzlaff as her constant cinematographer — he outcarols Carole in this one, making her look positively luscious. Omy, omy, that this cynic should rave on thus! I like film. DIPPY DITTIES Film is full of sil-ver. Sil-ver makes won-der-ful mon-ey. I'm ve-ry fond of mon-ey. It makes such in-ter-es-ting con-ver-sa-tion. I like film. R. THRITIS Silly Sally thinks "farce comedy" is just Bostonese for "guickie." THE MACARONI BOWL, by the Shovel Boys (They dish the dirt). * * * It seems that platinum does tarnish after all. Our platinum blondes are clouding up on us, most of them becoming converted to the color which has been dubbed "brownette" — a sort of golden taffy brown. Jean Harlow and Natalie Moorhead and now Ann Sothern are among the vanguard of the Little Chameleons. * * * Apropos, Max Factor opened his new factory and salesrooms last month, and in it he has separate beauty rooms for the especial care required for the four types of beauty — blond, brunette, red-head, and the new "brownette." * * * Sally Eilers and Harry Joe Brown call their baby "Poochy" because when she 'was very young Sally starred in "Carnival," and in that picture her name was "Poochy." In a recent newspaper article a columnist misspelled the name and wrote it "Pouchy." How horrid! * • • Any girt who worries about having children for fear she'll lose her girlish figure should have seen Bennett step from the train on her return from a New York vacation last mouth. Joan was as trim and lovely as any nineteen-year-old, in spite of having borne three youngsters. * * * Another young lady in pictures who grows with motherhood it dainty Frances Dee. Xow that she is back in circulation again after the birth of her second el ild maybe we'll see her in some more splendid roles like that of the stenographer in "The Gay Deception." * * * The Palm Springs Tennis Club is open again under the guidance of Ralph Bellamy and Charlie Farrell. This year they have added an attractvie swimming pool, sez'eral new courts, and a small but -very smart bar to their growing accommodations. * * * June Knight seems to just continue on and on in her engagement in. "Jubilee" at the Shubert Theatre in Boston. * * * Gtenda Farrell ing for the first time last mouth, and jumped from a score of 27 i'm her first line to 87 in her second. Glenda I with Addison Randall, her current b.f., who used tit bowl frequently and excellently, but who had to give it up for months because^ of two broken fingt those decorating his right hand. " * * The Santa Fe Railway announces that, the Fred Harvey meal cost will take a drop. That's pretty tough. It took a drop too much during prohibition and got higher'n a kite. But if prices of meals on trains do come down, it will be hard on the movie stars who travel to reduce their incomes. They'll have to pay bigger incomes taxes. TOUCHING FINISHES "'Listen, dame, if you don't get that dug "ffa tins stage pronto I'm gonna throw it off, see I Them are direct from Mr. Blitt:, and Mr. Blitt this here studio, see! . . . Sow. don't gimme that, I know his sweetie by sight, and so does c in the studio. . . . O-o-o-h. excuse me . . means you're Mrs. Blitt:. . . .