Modern Screen (Feb-Dec 1959)

I Will Be Faithful (Continued from -page 56) done during the year. The day we repent. It's that simple, Baby." Again Liz nodded. Then she asked, "And do you pray?" "I do," Mike said. He smiled. "Surprised?" Liz didn't answer. Mike took her hand. "My old man," he said, "he knew all the prayers. He was a Rabbi, so he knew all of them — plus some. He tried to teach me. Boy, what he went through. We used to sit in the apartment sometimes — when he could catch me — or in that dilapidated, tiny synagogue he ran. And he'd say, 'Avrumele, you must learn your prayers if you are to become any kind of man.' I tried. I was too wild — my mind was always filled with too many other things — to remember them. But I tried. And there is one prayer I remember, for Yom Kippur . . . one." "How does it go?" Liz asked. Mike thought for a moment. Then he closed his eyes and, slowly, he began to speak. "For all my sins, for all that I repent, Heavenly Father," he said, "do not forgive me, no — but make me hate, despise, loathe these sins; and when I have curbed my temper, given cheer to others, spoken kindly of others, returned good for evil, abandoned my impurity, corrected my falsehoods . . . then let me feel Your loving arms around me. Then may 1 say to You, 'my Father,' and, within my heart, hear You answer, 'I am with thee, my beloved child.' Amen." He opened his eyes. "Pretty good, eh?" he asked. For a while, Liz said nothing. Sins in Liz' life "There are things in my life I repent," she said, finally, almost in a whisper. "Be pretty weird if there weren't," Mike said. "But — " Liz said, "even though I beilieve in God, Mike, I've never found a prayer that I could believe in as much &s ... as I just felt you believed in yours." "Your old man wasn't a rabbi," Mike said, laughing. "Maybe you've gotta have these things drummed into you." Liz shook her head. "No," she said, "it's not that." Mike shrugged. "So skip your dinner tonight and say my prayer," he said. For another while — a long while — Liz said nothing. Then she said, "Mike . . . maybe I should become Jewish." Mike's laughter was gone by now. "Why?" he asked, seriously. "So I can be as good as you," Liz said. "So, deep down, I can believe as much, as strongly, as you. So I can prove what I regret in my life ... so maybe the rest of my life will be a better one." Mike sighed. "The real God in a person's life doesn't come easy," Mike said. "I know," Liz said. "You'll have to learn a lot, to study a lot," Mike said. "I know," Liz said. "But Mike ... I want God so much. And the God you love — maybe that is the God I should love, the God who will love me back in return ... I'd like to at least try, Mike." Later that night, Liz looked up from the book she was reading. "Mike," she said, "do you know what it says here — in Ruth, in The Old Testament?" "What?" Mike asked. "It says," said Liz, "But Ruth said, 'Entreat me not to leave you or to return from, following you; for where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people, and your God my God. . . .' " She looked up again. Mike nodded. "Maybe," he said. "And where you die," Liz went on reading, "I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if even death parts me from you. . ." "Where you die ... I will die" Liz and Mike were parted by death a little less than a year later. Mike was killed in a plane crash. Liz was left behind to mourn him. It was the most tragic, the most difficult period of her life. "I want to die, too," she said once, not long after the funeral, to Mike's good friend, Eddie Fisher. They were sitting together alone, on the terrace of Liz's big house. The day was gray and gloomy. There was a dark, cloud-filled sky above them. "I don't want to go on without him," Liz said "I want to die, too. I can't live without Mike. I can't — " "Liz, the word can't didn't exist for Mike," Eddie broke in. "If he were here now, what would he say to you? He'd say something like, 'Listen to me good, Baby — you're just wasting precious breath!' Wouldn't he say that? He'd kid with you, Liz. He'd make you end up laughing instead of crying. But that would be his message — that the word can't doesn't exist . . . Liz, look up. Come on, raise your head and look up. Mike never looked down. Even when he was on top of the world he was always looking up." Liz shook her head. She wiped her eyes with a handkerchief she clutched. "Why was he taken away from me?" Then Eddie said, very simply, "We cannot question God, Liz." "God," Liz whispered. "I sought Him. Maybe I didn't try very hard. Maybe I tried to do it the easy way, not hard enough. But I asked Him to help me . . . and what happened?" "We cannot question God," Eddie said, once again. "Our very hairs are numbered. Liz, The Bible tells you that. Don't you think that God knew better than any human could when Mike's time should come? Don't you think Mike would have told you exactly what I'm telling you? That he would have said, 'You're the boss, God . . . You brought me into this world and you gave me a lot of good things while I was in it and if you want to take me now — well, you're the boss' . . . Don't you think that's what Mike would have said, Liz?" "Yes," Liz whispered, "I do . . ." An earnest decision It was shortly after that Liz began to study the Jewish religion in earnest. For weeks, quietly, she read her Bible, then the Talmud, and the other great Jewish books of learning. Then one day she went to see a Rabbi — Rabbi Max Nussbaum. "I want to convert," she told him. "You must be sincere, my child," he said. "I am," Liz said. A year later, the Rabbi was able to say: "We do not encourage converts, unless they are very sincere. Elizabeth was. When she first discussed her wish to become a convert with me, I wanted to be sure it was not just a whim. In a sense, I put her through the works. Not until I was completely convinced of her sincerity did I encourage her to accept the faith she was so eager to accept." A few days before the ceremony of her conversion, Liz broke the news to her Coated elastic band WON'T TANGLE OR TEAR! No more ugly rubber bonds to pinch, pull or twist your hair! Pony Pin-Up coated elastic bond slips on and off easily and painlessly . . . fastens securely... holds and molds contour of your pony tail. For all ages ! Six smart styles— plain or ornamented. Prices start at 4 for 290 at variety, drug, food, department store or beauty shop. made of cooted elastic bond Write for illustrated booklet, "18 Ways to Set Pony Tails'.' Send 104 to: Lady Ellen, Los Angeles 5 1, Calif. Dept. 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