Modern Screen (Jan-Dec 1960)

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■ A vintage phonograph was one of the prize possessions in the barber shop of Papa Durante on Catherine Street on New York City's Lower East Side. And the music heard on it most freq-iently was the symphonic records of .Arturo Toscanini . . . with Enrico Caruso records a close second. When young Jimmy Durante wasn't lathering up the customers to get them ready for his dad's razor, he was forwer cranking up the old phonograph. "My father never let me shave a customer or cut their hair," Jimmy recalls, "but he sure did trust me with that phonograph. The only trouble was I didn't dare play the records I liked. It had to be Toscanini or Caruso. To him they were Roman gods. "I didn't treat them with much reverence though. Years later when I needed a specialty song for my radio program I wrote a tune called Toscanini, Stokowski and Me. I got the best of it in the lyrics, and the song wound up with me saying that Stokowski couldn't sing but I could, and Toscanini couldn't play the piano, but I could. "I could tell it was a hit when the studio audience laughed (they got in free), and even up in the sponsor's booth there was a frozen smile when they heard it. So I sang it again— wid emphasasis ! "I got back to my hotel a couple of hours later and noticed a little man wearing a big black hat, waiting outside my room. This is either a bill collector or an autograph collector, I thinks— and he wasn't holding an autograph book. I began wondering if the payments on my tuxedo were up to date. "Well, I walked up to the door, sort of nonchalant, and he draws himself up to his full five feet two and looks at me like I had insulted all his ancestors. "'Mr. Durante?' he asked. "Yes," I admitted. Then he poked his fist at me, but just to hand me his calling card. " 'There are several things you don't know about me, Mr. Durante,' he shouted. " 'First, my name is Toscanini . . . second, I do play the piano-and much better than you. "'I also can sing better than you. In fact, if I tried, I could even tell jokes better than you! Good night, Mr. Durante!' " end Look! Real cream deodorant your fingers need never touch ! New glide-on applicator! Just twist the bottom . . . cream comes out the top! Now you can have the all-day protection only a real cream deodorant can give plus glide-on convenience — both in new Desert Dri. It glides on and rubs in right from its own exclusive applicator. Not just a rolled-on surface coating, it penetrates for positive all-day protection. Checks perspiration, stops odor, won't damage clothes. 3 months'1 supply — 1.00 plus tax. New Desert Dri®— real cream deodorant— anti-perspirant by Shulton ©Shulton, Inc., 1960