Modern Screen (Feb - Oct 1933 (assorted issues))

own. They naturally flee to the woman who laughs easily, who has no griefs or burdens or problems to propound. One of the things that attracted me to Vivian was her easy, spontaneous laughter. I am a moody person, inclined to melancholy. That gaiety, that bubbling giggle, seemed to me lovely and alluring. "It may be unfair. But it is true that men shrink from complaining women who insist upon telling their troubles and demanding sympathy. If there is any sympathy going around, the man wants it himself! It's the way we are made. A clever woman keeps her troubles to herself — or saves them to tell her best woman friend!" Most of the men with whom I talked put great emphasis upon the importance of femininity — the frilly, helpless thing. You know what I mean. Yet, most of them objected violently to traits that are characteristically feminine ones. There's, no pleasing the creatures ! Bob Montgomery wails, "If they only wouldn't ask so many silly questions, imagining that they are making conversation ! If they only wouldn't trump their partner's aces \" Yet he objects to women who go in heavily and earnestly for athletics. And he loathes women who use exotic perfumes ! Clark Gable has crisp and emphatic ideas upon the subject. He wishes that women would never, never, never try to be coy ! That they would never take on the airs of sophistication unless it is real. Descending to smaller matters, he remarked, "I wish that they wouldn't wear ruffles and lace and ribbons unless they are the type for those things. So few women are ! And so many women do it. There is nothing more depressing than a woman adorned and bedecked with one thing and another when she would be much lovelier in simpler attire. On second thought, I believe that no woman should ever wear frills. It makes her — er — obvious. It is an apparent appeal to the male. It is bad showmanship ! "On the other hand, I do wish that they would wear stockings. One pair of legs in a thousand will bear scrutiny without them. And no pair of legs whose owner is over twenty can possibly bear it. They should get a glimpse of their own knees from the back ! It is so stupid of them ! Any shapely leg, in a thin covering of silk, may be alluring ! If the legs are not shapely — then they should thank Providence for the boon of long skirts !" WHILE we were talking in the publicity offices at M-G-M, Jackie Cooper came in. He listened so attentively that it occurred to me that he might have some ideas of his own upon the subject. So I asked him. His first reply was a characteristic, boyish, "Aw — ! !" But under slight (oh, ever so slight!) urging, he unbent. "Well, they might remember not to talk baby talk to a fellow !" he said, Modern Screen resentfully. "A pretty grown-up fellow ! And they needn't kiss a guy !" Warming to his subject, he opined, "They needn't ask you if you are their best beau and they needn't pat you on the head, either !" Further conversation revealed that women had objectionable ideas about the exaggerated importance of soap and water, that they were inclined to clean out dresser drawers and closets with a disconcerting disregard for the importance of certain objects belonging to a guy. Jackie, one gathered, had suffered at the hands of the other sex. As we parted, he tossed an additional remark over his shoulder. "If they have to kiss you," he said, with resignation, born of long suffering, "they might at least not have their mouths all smeared with red, gooey stuff that comes off!" Older men than Jackie have complained of that ! Hardie Albright wishes women would not ask him how many stitches there are in the football — "just at the psychological moment when the player is about to make a forward pass which, if completed, may wrap up the old ball game." He wishes it so intensely that he now declines to take a lady to a football game at all ! Bob Armstrong objects (as do a lot of other men) to women squealing kittenishly when they enter the ocean. "Why such a fuss about it," he inquires, with that awful, masculine logic, "if they want to go in at all ? They needn't, you know !" Harry Bannister objects to overdeveloped muscles in ladies. (I found a number of men who were pretty bitter about this.) "Women have achieved, with fair success, what they have gone after in this present generation," Harry says, with resentment. "Why can't they be satisfied? Why do they have to go violently athletic and beat you at games which you have always imagined were your own? It hurts a man's pride. A clever woman won't win at athletic contests— if she is interested in the male contestant! Women don't belong in athletic contests. At least, there are a lot of men who believe that they don't. "It's tough, you know, to fall in love with a girl who could probably beat the tar out of you in an argument. And that feminine gesture of lifting a pale and graceful hand to adjust a stray lock of hair loses a lot of its charm if the flexed arm looks like Jack Dempsey's." From all of which I gather that men (at least the men who are in pictures) still have their ideals about women. They wish that they would remain "feminine"— by which they mean clinging, flattering and not too efficient at anything. They hope for honesty. They hope for tact Most of all, they do not want to be disillusioned. They are not so different, these men who are in pictures, these men who meet the world's famous sirens, day after day, from any other men one meets, are they? DON'T FORGET THAT MODERN SCREEN IS ON SALE AT THE S. S. KRESCE AND S. H. KRESS STORES Vaseline Sll»kUrt,'lD Hr-= . "EG. U.S. PAT. OFF. ... \rfli*°f: 0"s ^dfJtes. a"d Chafing. 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