We use Optical Character Recognition (OCR) during our scanning and processing workflow to make the content of each page searchable. You can view the automatically generated text below as well as copy and paste individual pieces of text to quote in your own work.
Text recognition is never 100% accurate. Many parts of the scanned page may not be reflected in the OCR text output, including: images, page layout, certain fonts or handwriting.
C L A S S I
Case VII
Modem Youth may be guilty of speeding, of musical murder, and of assault and battery on the good old Mother Tongue. But are the bright-eyed youngsters guilty of everything they are accused of by their model elders? How about these charges against the youth of that so-called modem Babylon — Hollywood? William Janney and his cronies are here to tell how innocent they are. — Editor's Note.
PROSECUTING ATTORNEY: Do you stand for youth ? The Defendant: I do.
P. A.: Well, sit down. {Turns to courtroom for appreciation of his little joke. Gets booed. Continues:) Maybe you don't know it, but we, the people, feel that the youth of today isn't so much.
Young Bill Janney: You'll have me crying next — P. A.: And that it can easily be found guilty on at least four counts —
Janney: Let's have 'em. One at a time — P. A.: — and that you'll have to talk awfully fast to do any good for yourself. In the first place, we believe modern youth, especially modern Hollywood youth, is headed straight for hell.
Janney: Mr. Prosecutor! Please! Your language! Remember there are gentlemen in the audience. {Turns to courtroom.) Will Messrs. Russell Gleason, William Bakewell and Arthur Lake please present proof that they are gentlemen.^
(The Messrs. Gleason, Bakewell and Lake present priwafacie evidence.)
They're Hardly Themselves
'ANNEY: I might as well explain. I brought these gentlemen along as witnesses. At this very moment, they are in the audience disguised as each other. William
Court Reporter: ROBERT FENDER
Bakewell, for instance, represents Russell Gleason, who i disguised as Arthur Lake. Mr. Lake, in turn, appears in my likeness, while I — Gentlemen, very few know this — in reality, / am Greta Garbo.
P. A. {with tears streaming down his face): As God is my witness, I've been a cad. Can you ever forgive me.^
Janney: Youth is quick to forget. All is forgiven.
P. A.: Good! And now let's get on with the trial. Per sonally, I'd like to get to the beach. May I ask Witness Russell Gleason to step to the stand.'
(Russell Gleason advances, doing a soft-shoe dance.)
Clerk: Will the witness repeat after me: "I, Rusiell Gleason, being of sound mind and body and all that rubbish, do hereby swear and so forth, that I will speak the truth, only the truth and nothing but the truth, unless I think of something better.?"
Russell: You took the words right out of my mouth.
Clerk {to P. A.): He's O. K. Shoot.
P. A.: My charge against you, as a representative of HolljTvood youth, is that you waste time, our most valuable possession. Is that right?
His Idea of Fun
USSELL: That's right, except that it's wrong. My J\ time is pretty well divided. Work claims most of it. Tne rest I spend at playing as hard as I can play. I've found that's necessary.
P. A.: Ah, yes — playing! Your idea of the best time in the world is to dawdle away time in a night-club, possibly.?
Russell: Sorry to disappoint you, but no. There will be lots of time for that when I'm your age. Right now I'd rather meet interesting people — all I can. If you've got your pencil and paper ready, you might write down that Russell Gleason says that his idea of the best time in the world is to listen to those brighter than himself. I know of
36