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Funny
Stories That Are True
By THE PLAYERS THEMSELVES
(Collected by ALBERT L. ROAT)
A Close Call
By CARLYLE BLACKWELL
AN incident in my career, which strikes me as being humorous now, did not seem so very amusing at the time it occurred.
I was playing the hero in a melodrama down Sout h, principally "onenight" stands. One hot afternoon we landed in a small town near the river. I sauntered to the bank, and the water looked so cool and inviting that I hired about the only boat in sight and, with a negro at the oars, navigated 'round where the shade was most evident.
I basked there in the cool breeze, giving myself just time to return for • a hasty meal and to "make up " for the play. As we approached the bank, a man rose up to the water 's edge to meet us.
"Come ashore !" he shouted.
"Bring that boat in, you nigger, and you — (addressing me) — thought you could make a getaway, eh? Well, I'm too smart for you!"
Naturally, I was perplexed and ordered my oarsman to halt. Then, from a safe distance offshore, I ex
CARLYLE BLACKWELL
plained to the stranger who I was, but to no purpose. Evidently the negro became suspicious and bumped the boat into the bank. I had visions of a night in the town jail. I sprang ashore, at the same time giving the boat a vigorous push with my foot, upsetting the darkey. The gentleman with the chin whiskers had dismounted. He made a grab at me. I eluded him and, adding a well-directed left to his jaw, turned and ran and had the satisfaction of hearing a second splash.
When I arrived at the theater, I told my story. The manager made inquiries and learnt that the stranger was a constable. He had been ordered to watch for a young forger whose appearance corresponded with mine. I left town that night, with a false mustache and a different suit of clothes. I have since played the forger lots of times — but not in real life!
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117
The Blue Box
By AUGUSTUS PHILLIPS
actor's wardrobe is a cumbersome affair when on the road. My first season "out" I traveled with my brother, a promi
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