My own story (1934)

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MY OWN STORY and in the face of much opposition accepted it. My friends all warned me that this was a step backward. "You'll never play Broadway again," they predicted dolefully. An immediate result of the plunge into vaudeville was an engagement of ten weeks straight at Proctor's Fifty-Eighth Street Theater, a run which broke all existing records. It was at Proctor's that my acquaintance with Mrs. Stuyvesant Fish began. In my act, I carried a basket of onions. All at once it seemed to me an excellent idea to throw them playfully at the spectators. The biggest one of the lot landed squarely on Mrs. Fish's head. When I saw what had happened, I was paralyzed with fright for Mrs. Fish's reputation for arrogance was no secret. Imagine my surprise when a few days later, I received a note from her secretary, asking me to appear as a paid performer at one of Mrs. Fish's famous parties. I accepted. When I reached her house on the appointed evening, her secretary asked me if I would mind singing my songs at intervals instead of all at one time. Of course, I said that I should be delighted to work as Mrs. Fish wished. I learned that the week before, she had made the same request of a European light-opera star whom she was paying a huge sum of money to entertain her guests. The artist had haughtily refused. 132