Photoplay (Jan-Jun 1960)

device to get attention, Tuesday jokingly tried to pass it off with: “No, I’m a beatnik.” “It would have taken six weeks to explain why I really came with no shoes,” she told me, and then she paused. “I don’t know whether I’m a beatnik or not. There are 50,000 definitions and explanations of the word. I think I’m a young girl who is doing her job and working hard at it.” She seemed really hurt and suddenly said, again, “I’m not a freak!” Then she looked sad. And I asked if she ever cried. “I cry pretty well,” Tuesday smiled, pushing back a lock of hair that had strayed across her cheek. “I hold off most emotion until the time comes where it is so built up, I explode. Then I cry for a week. When I start crying, you can’t stop me.” So it has been all her life — the mask of aloof worldliness behind which lay hidden hurts. Less than a fortnight earlier it had happened again. Some friends were at the house, and Tuesday volunteered to get some food at the Gaiety Delicatessen on Sunset Strip. “I was supposed to be back in a couple of minutes, but I was gone more than an hour,” she confessed. “I got about $10 worth of food, just about everything they had — fudge, cold cuts, pickles, olives, knishes, lox. It was such fun picking out all the stuff. But, when I got home, everyone was quite disgusted with my lack of consideration.” Tuesday didn’t blame them, either, but the reproach was more than she could bear. “I lost my appetite completely, threw down my food, and cried,” she said, “because I was hurt.” And then suddenly she started talking about her childhood, about a time when she was around three or four, and her favorite plaything was a battered old beanbag her grandmother had given her. “I got attached to a little beanbag the shape of an egg, like Humpty Dumpty,” she said “It had little crooked legs and arms attached to it. This was my little doll. All the other little girls in the neighborhood had Jane Cries dolls. I didn’t have a regular doll’s blanket, either. I had a little crocheted multicolored blanket for Jacob. That’s what I called my beanbag.” Jacob was so different from the other dolls, even as Tuesday, in her way, was so different from the other children. “The real reason I didn’t like the dolls,” she tried to explain, “was because when the dolls cried they weren’t real. I just didn’t like the idea of filling the dolls with water and turning them upside down to make them cry. I’d rather coddle my mother’s nail polish or Jacob.” A soft, nostalgic smile spread across Tuesday’s face. “Jacob had the most beautiful expression,” she went on. “The dolls all had the same expression, but I could change Jacob’s looks anytime I wanted, just by twisting his legs or squeezing him. He had the most flexible features. You could sit him on a shelf. You could cross his legs. He was always interested. He had an inquisitive look on his face all the time.” But the look on the faces of the other children, she told me, was one of ridicule and scorn. “They always made fun of me and my beanbag. One day, they just grabbed him away from me and threw him in the street. They put him in the gutter where it was muddy and dirty. They said how silly it was to act as if Jacob was a real doll, and they had a real laugh over it.” OPPORTUNITIES for EVERYBODY Writ© to Publisher's Classified Department (Trademark), 9 South Clinton Street, Chicago 6, for advertising rates. OF INTEREST TO WOMEN PWC-Mar’60 $500 FOR YOUR Child's Picture (All Ages), Hundreds used Send small picture for approval. Returned with report. Print child’s parents' name, address. Spotlite, 1611 North La Brea PC, Hollywood, California. BEAUTY DEMONSTRATORS — TO $5.00 hour demonstrating Famous Hollywood Cosmetics, your neighborhood. For free samples, details, write Studio Girl, Dept. 1603C, Glendale, California. 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