Photoplay (Jan-Jun 1948)

ring , mail it to him uith an explanatorynote •, then go aivay for a while. Choose some place of which he would not think, and warn your parents to be on their guard against this man. I don’t want to seem to be melodramatic, but you have only to read your daily paper to discover that blood is shed daily by just such a man as Jack appears to be. Were you never to marry, it would be far better for you than to attempt to build any sort of life with Jack. Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: I am twenty years old and was recently discharged from the Army. I have an enormous inferiority complex because I consider myself hopelessly ugly. Whenever I see a girl I feel like running. During the entire two years I was in service I had only one date. I ruined this girl’s evening because I spent the entire time being afraid that everyone was looking at me and laughing at me. When I called her the next day in hope of making a future date she gave me an emphatic “no.” Now that I am back in civvies I fear I will never again find a girl to date me. George F. I believe I am entirely safe in saying that your problem is not your appearance, but your self-consciousness. Any person who spends his entire time thinking not of the comfort and the pleasure and the desires of the person icith whom he is spending an evening, but only of his own misery, his misgivings, and the possibility that someone is looking at him, is exceedingly poor company, indeed. Any girl who goes out with you is probably convinced afterward that you were bored and, hence , were ignoring her. Psychologists claim that the one certain way to gain popularity is to become objective in one's viewpoint. The subjective person is the sensitive, cringing human being who feels that every stone in the world is leveled at him. If you will repair to your public library and read whatever volumes of Alfred Adler are available, I think you will find precisely the help you need. Remember that some of the most successful men of all time have been noted for lack of physical attraction. Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: I am married and have a baby daughter two months old, but I am not getting along with my husband at all. He is twenty-one and I am nineteen. He pays no attention whatsoever to the baby and, as a matter of fact, has admitted that he doesn’t like her at all. It makes him furious if I say that I would like to see my mother occasionally. He says the married girl is not supposed to be thinking of her family. However, he spends a great deal of time with his. I quit my job last January. I had a wonderful position and many friends. My former employer has been begging me to come back ever since I left. My mother has advised me to come home, where she can take care of the baby, so that I can go back to work. My husband contributes nothing to our support. I had money in the bank that I had saved and with that I even paid my hospital bill. I have been wondering if I should give him a scare and go home. He was discharged from the Navy last January and keeps saying he wishes he were back living the Navy life. He isn’t working and hasn’t even looked for work. Vivian L. First of all, 1 don’t think it is wise ever to attempt to give anyone “ a scare.” No such drastic action as leaving your husband when you have a small youngster should be undertaken for the dramatic effect. Having studied all angles of a given situation and having arrived at a conclusion, you should act from principles, but never to make a shotv. Since your husband was so happy in the Navy, I wonder if your problem might not be solved temporarily by your husband’s joining up again. 1 think that he, like many men of twenty-one, is not quite ready to assume the responsibilities of a family. It is possible that at the end of his enlistment he would have grown up enough to return to you as a sensible and useful man. Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: In our city we had three teen-age canteens originally. One was put out of business because the members misbehaved. The second was run mostly by our highschool fraternities and sororities, so it has become clannish. Our own group, sponsored by Hi-Y’s and Girl Reserves, is the only group in which membership is not restricted. We have issued cards for charter members and have allowed them to bring one guest but a group of tough kids in this part of town have decided to take over. In spite of the presence of our chaperones, these kids crash every party we give. They are ruining the club’s reputation. We are afraid we are going to have to close unless we can think of some solution. George J. I think that it is easy, in the midst of an endeavor, to lose sight of the original reason for launching a plan. Obviously, your groups started out with the laudable intention of forming a club that would keep a group of young people busy and happy . . . and out of mischief. Those people who are ring-leaders in such an enterprise are not the students most in need of recreation. Active students are so busy and so constructive in their attitudes that they represent no problem. The students most in need of help are usually those who aren’t normally included in school functions. The boys of whom you speak are the ones who need your club desperately. Even though they join only by “ crashing” the first few times, if they have fun, and if the chaperones maintain order — those boys will return and contribute, not only to the welfare of the club, but to the orderliness of the entire school. Why don’t you constitute yourself committee chairman of a hospitality group and try to include these recalcitrants in your guest list? Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: Bob and I love one another very much, but the barrier between us is his sister, Delia, a pretty divorcee. She has more boy friends than any other girl I know. However, she also states that the only person she really loves is her brother. She laughingly told me that she had come between Bob and every girl he ever liked. I can believe this as, when Bob came back from the Army, she kept cutting in on our first telephone conversation, and she even sent me telegrams, signing his name. When Bob took a job in a town some distance from our home, I moved to be near him and also took a job. We have been planning to be married as soon as we could find a home. However, I have been entertaining doubts, because he still writes to Delia once a week and he worries himself sick if he doesn’t hear from her. Occasionally, she calls him long distance— always collect. She has persuaded their father on several occasions to write to Bob, begging him to come home to stay. I have made up my mind that she shall never become a fireside companion in my home and yet Bob loves her, and if I criticize her it makes him most unhappy. Polly O. Frankly, I don’t think Bob has grown up yet. So long as a man clings to his family, he is not an emotional adult. If you were to marry Bob in his present state, there can be little doubt that Delia would interfere with your marriage. If you are willing to wait for Bob to grow up, you should prolong your engagement, but if this situation doesn’t adjust itself soon you would be wise to take an interest in another boy. Claudette Colbert Mernj Christmas! Did this Yuletide issue bring you the portraits in color of your favorite woman star and man star? If not, now’s the time to put in Ifmir New |lear in Photoplay’s Color Portrait Poll. Clip out the coupon and send to COLOR PORTRAIT EDITOR, PHOTOPLAY MAGAZINE 205 East 42nd Street, New York 17, N. Y. Man Woman MY NAME I Ed. Note: We regret this cannot mean you will receive color portraits of the stars. It means the pictures in full color of the stars receiving the most votes will appear in Photoplay. I