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How I Trained My Husband
—MRS. JERRY LEWIS
(Continued from page 53) what in the world happened?” he asked me.
“They were scattered all over the place.” I tried to sound surprised. “Why — I thought you wanted them sent out. . . .”
There was a long groan. “Oh, no, Patsy, you couldn’t have. . . .”
But I did. And since then, Jerry has tried to be neat while traveling.
At our house in Los Angeles, tidiness is no problem with him. It’s the first permanent home he’s ever had. As a kid he was constantly on the road with his parents, who are in show business too, and later on with his and Dean’s act. He is so proud of the home that he is meticulous about everything. Jerry is the first to notice a crooked picture or a book askew. But trying to keep Jerry from letting the funny-man within run away with him at the dinner table has always been a difficult, uphill struggle. Slapping a pat of butter on his wrist, then turning to the person next to him with: “What’s the time, Mac?” is his Number One Gag.
Usually he finishes a meal by neatly rolling up his napkin, holding it over his face, and then letting one side drop down like a curtain. “Finis,” he’ll scream.
This used to embarrass me no end. I remember our first invitation to dinner at the home of Loretta Yo\ing and her husband, Tom Lewis. It was a party for thirty people. Jerry was seated next to Loretta and I was at the other end of Ithe table, next to Tom. Despite my fervent hopes and prayers, Jerry went through his usual routine, keeping everyone in an uproar. Afterwards, I apologized to Loretta. {‘Don’t ever,” she said. “Jerry knows just how far to go.”
While Jerry may get away with it when ve eat out, at home he gets angry when )ur boys, Gary, seven, and Ronnie, three, ry to put on their own act. When my lubtle jibes at his own “funny” habits lidn’t help, I had to resort to more drasic measures. The butter-onwrist routine ipset me most so instead of butter I Itpted serving him a dollar pocket watch ivith h^ hotcakes. This, he found an amusng switch on his own gag — and it helped.
And getting the kids into the picture has lone a lot of good, too. For instance, I eel Jerry needs spinach. Yet I know lie’ll scream whenever I serve it. But he’ll cream even louder if the kids — who on’t like spinach either — leave anything n their plates. What to do? Serve the ame generous helping to all three of bem at the same time. When Jerry starts ■ 3 make faces, I point to the kids’ plates -and he’ll smile sheepishly and eat!
As yet I haven’t fully succeeded in I laking him pay attention to me at break i 1st time. Between the Los Angeles Times,
' Hollywood Reporter and the Daily I ariety, I can talk my head off and he’ll I ever even hear me. So, not long ago, I L Jsorted to new tactics: Before Jerry gets chance to pick up his papers, I cut out I il the items that interest him most, parj cularly stories about him and Dean — id hand them over after breakfast. Result: e ^ now slurps his food so fast I still I m’t keep a conversation going.
, Getting Jerry up in the morning is a roblem all its own. I’ve tried to wake him f serving hot coffee in bed and turning 1 the radio. No go. So now I send the ds in as re-enforcements. After they 'mp all over him, wipe his face with
t' feather-duster, fire their water pistols his face and play the concertina from a
KITA HAYWORTH
BETTY GRABLE
MARIO LANZA
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STAR CANDIDS
1 . Lona Tomer
2. Befty Grable 5. Alan Ladd
7. Gregory Peck
8. Rita Hayworth
9. Esther Williams
1 1. Elizabeth Taylor 1 4, Cornel Wilde 1 5. Frank Sinatra 1 8. Rory Calhoun 19. Peter Lowford
2 1 . Bob Mitchum
22. Burt Lancaster
23. Bing Crosby
24. Shirley Temple
25. Dale Evans
26. June Hover
27. June Allyson
29. Ronald Reagon
30. Dana Andrews
3 1 . Glenn Ford
33. Gene Autry
34. Roy Rogers
35. Sunset Carson
36. Monte Hale
46. Kathryn Grayson 48. Gene Kelly
50. Diana Lynn
51 . Doris Day
52. Montgomery Clift
53. Richard Widmark
54. Mona Freeman
55. Wanda Hendrix
56. Perry Como
57. Bill Holden 60. Bill Williams
63 Borbara Lawrence
65. Jane Powell
66. Gordon MacRae
67. Ann Blyth
68. Jeanne Crain
69. Jane Russell
74. John Woyne
75. Yvonne de Carlo
78. Audie Murphy
79. Dan Dailey 84. Janet Leigh 86. Farley Granger 88. Tony Martin
91 . John Derek
92. Guy Madison
93. Ricardo Montalban
94. Mario Lanza
95. Joan Evans
103. Scott Brody
104. Bill Lawrence
1 05. Vic Damone
106. Shelley Winters
1 07. Richard Todd
1 08. Vera-Ellen
I 09. Dean Martin
I I 0. Jerry Lewis 111. Howard Keel
1 1 2. Susan Hayward
I 1 5. Betty Hutton
I I 6. Coleen Gray 1 20. Arlene Dahl 121. Tony Curtis
1 23. Tim Holt 1 27. Piper Laurie 128. Debbie Reynolds 1 29, Penny Edwards 131. Jerome Courtland 1 34. Gene Nelson 1 35. JefF Chandler 1 36. Rock Hudson
137. Stewart Granger
138. John Barrymore, Jr. 1 39. Debra Paget
140. Dale Robertson
141. Marilyn Monroe
1 42. Leslie Caron 1 43. Pier Angeii
144. Mitzi Gaynor
145. Marlon Brando 1 46. Aldo Roy
1 47. Tab Hunter
148. Robert Wagner
149. Rusty Tamblyn 1 50. Jeff Hunter
151. Marisa Pavan
152. Marge and Gower Champion
153. Fernando Lamas
154. Arthur Franz
155. Johnny Stewart
156. Oskar Werner
1 57. Keith Andes
158. Michael Moore
1 59. Gene Barry 1 60. John Forsyth
WORLD WIDE, Dept. PH-7 63 Central Avenue, Ossining, N. Y.
I enclose $ . . for candid pictures of my favorite
stars and have circled the numbers of the ones you are to send me by return mail.
NAME
STREET
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161. Lori Nelson
1 62. Ursula Thiess
1 63. Elaine Stewart
164. Hildegarde Neff
165. Dawn Addams 1 66. Zsa Zsa Gabor 1 67. Barbara Ruick
1 68. Joan Taylor
169. Helene Stanley
170. Beverly Michaels
171. Joan Rice
172. Robert Horton
1 73. Dean Miller
1 74. Rita Gam
175. Charlton Heston
176. Steve Cochran
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