Photoplay (Jul-Dec 1947)

We’re heroes to the countless women who use DeLong Bob Pins . . . They fasten a medal on us every time they step up to the counter and ask for DeLong, the Bob Pin with the Stronger Qrip . . .We’re grateful, too. That’s why we spare no effort to turn out a better Bob Pin, one made of stronger steel that keeps its snap and shape longer and stays in your hair dutifully. Always remember DeLong for — Stronger Grip Won t Slip Out Quality [Manufacturers for Over 50 years BOB PINS HAIR PINS SAFETY PINS HOOKS & EYES HOOK a EYE TAPES SNAPS PINS SANITARY BELTS (Continued from page 4) to get a job but the payment for unskilled labor is small and building a marriage is expensive. In addition to feeding, clothing and housing two persons, you would also have to put something aside for the countless emergencies which arise. I believe that you, personally, should settle down to making a success of your school work, and that you should stand by your mother who must need you very much at this time. Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: I have two children by a former marriage. My present husband doesn’t care for these children. He says he loves me with all his heart, which I believe he does, and I love him deeply. We had been married only a few months when we separated because of the children. Not because of anything really wrong that they did, but disagreements about what they should eat, how they were to be disciplined, taught, etc. When we were apart, I was miserable and my husband said he was too. He said we could start again in marriage only if I would turn my children over to their daddy’s mother to be reared. (She wanted them.) Now that we’re back together again, I miss my children terribly. I’m just so mixed up I don’t know which way to turn. Is it wrong for a woman to give up her children for the man she loves? (Mrs.) Leonard T. You have answered your own question: You don't feel right in your heart about having given your children to their grandmother to bring up, and you know that I can't reassure you. However, I do think there is help to be had in this situation. Your husband probably loves you very much, and instinctively resents the children because he fears that your love for them diminishes your love for him. This is a primitive attitude. A woman loves her children one way, her parents in another, and her mate in yet a different way, and every thinking person must — for hrs own peace of mind — recognize those facts. I think that, if some t vise person ( a social tcorker, a clergyman, a teacher) could talk to your husband, explaining some of the simple facts of psychology, he could be persuaded to be happy with you and your children. If your husband could be made to see that, by including the children in your home, he teas not losing a part of your love, but actually was gaining theirs, I think his behavior would change and the four of you could have a well-balanced family life. At least it is worth trying. Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: My husband and I have been married four years and have two children. I married at eighteen, my husband was twenty-one and in the service. Our first daughter was born while my husband was away and he, for that reason, did not supervise her early training, or even get to know her until she was two years old. Lee Anne is a sensitive, nervous child who needs a lot of care and loving, yet he does not understand, nor try to understand her. My husband and I have similar temperaments, and we argue over nothing at all. For one thing we are continually on edge because of Lee Anne. She cries so very much. We’ve tried every method of correction— even spanking which was advised by others — but nothing seems to turn her into a good, sunny child. Can you find any solution for me? Adele T. H. For two wonderful years your daughter’s world consisted only of herself and you. All babies are little royalists who regard themselves as the center of . the universe. In Lee Anne’s case, a strange man — and he was strange even if he happened to be her father — began to demand her mother's attention. So, in order to gain attention, she became fractious and difficult to handle. You and your husband should have been wise enough to anticipate and to understand this. Lee Anne should have been made to feel that her daddy loved her, not that he — quite like another child — teas jealous of her. And, while Lee Anne was still bewildered about losing half of her mother to a father, along came another baby to take up even more of your time. In addition to this, I would imagine that the atmosphere of your home — since you and your husband have been having temperamental troubles — has not been conducive to a feeling of security for the child. She shouldn’t be spanked. That will only increase your trouble. If it is at all possible, you and your husband should see a child welfare expert together. The sooner you do this, the better, because you have the beginning of a serious maladjustment in your home. Claudette Colbert Dear Miss Colbert: Well, here we are, two Marines stationed in China, who have gotten ourselves in one heck of a snafu. We have a buddy named A1 who is a nice kid, but shy. At a dance one night he saw this Russian girl and really fell for her, but he didn’t do anything except make barrack eyes at her. We thought that was wonderful, so we wrote him a letter, signing this girl’s name and saying that she had noticed him and would like to be his pen pal. He answered it right away. This correspondence went on for about two months, when we decided that we had better fix it up with this girl, just to add to the fun. She agreed to pretend that she had written the letters. We thought it was a howl until A1 came to us the other night, saying that he had asked this girl to marry him and she had agreed. I went to see the girl to tell her to lay off, but she said that she had always wanted to go to the States and here is her chance eventually. What shall we do now? (Sgt.) Denny T. ( Continued on page 8) CUXte Have you a problem which seems to have no solution? W ould you like the thoughtful advice of (Claudette CofU? If you would, write to her in care of Photoplay, 321 S. Beverly Drive, Beverly Hills, California, and if Miss Colbert feels that your problem is of general interest, she’ll consider answering it here. Names and addresses will be held confidential for your protection. '■^mrv= 6