Photoplay (Jul-Dec 1954)

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ForCalendars • Billboards other guys. I was glad she could feel at ease with me. Our evening was a whopping success. When you adopt a philosophy of living for today, you’d be surprised how ,it improves your relationships with people. Dreaming about tomorrow — or worrying about it — has a way of coming right straight through your personality and creating a sort of barrier between you and other people. And some of those people are bound to chalk it up as unfriendliness or perhaps hostility when they run into a guy — you — who’s a million miles away on his own private cloud. He doesn’t mean to be rude. He may not even be aware that his daydreams are so all-absorbing. But if it goes unexplained, the poor joker’s soon wondering why nobody bothers to say as much as hello to him any more. I remember once when I was in a blue mood and somewhat unconscious of the world around me. I forgot exactly what it was, but I was worrying about something that might happen. I went through the day without hearing half that was said to me. My father shook me out of it by telling a story he’d read. It was about a shopkeeper who was so low in spirits that he figured he d simply end it all. He got up one morning and made the decision. “This is going to be my last day on earth,” he decided. And because he figured he wasn’t going to be around much longer, he decided he might as well be pleasant at breakfast, instead of growling as usual. He was surprised at how cheerful his wife could be and he noted that on this particular morning his son was especially well-behaved. Because he knew he’d be gone next day, he smiled at the people he met on the street and was amazed at how many people smiled back at him. He felt sorry for the unhappy people who came into his shop and tried to cheer them up. After all, he figured, they were going to be around for tomorrow. He made many sales and also many friends. In fact, life was so good that he decided to stick around for another day. And then another. And so, finally, he took to living every day as if it were his last, and had a wonderful time. By now, he must be a grand old man in his hundreds! And a very happy one! I’ve never forgotten the story. Granted, this may be carrying things to extremes, but it’s worth thinking about. The “live-for-today” theory is something pretty wonderful when you apply it to your parents, too. I’ve known a good many kids who are inclined to take their parents for granted. They figure, well, the old man and the old lady are around to feed us and clothe us and take care of us, but thej never really understand us. I think the trouble is most kids simply don’t try to understand their parents. They love their parents, but they rarely look upon them as individuals with feelings, hopes and dreams — individuals who aren't really so old and who know what it’s like to be even younger! It isn’t until the youngsters themselves grow older that they realize their parents can be — and have been — their very best friends . . . and they wish they had found it out long before. Instead, they’ve been waiting for the day that they could come out from under parental authority. I’ve been very fortunate in that respect. My father and I have always had a manto-man relationship. My folks and I have always been close friends. Since they’ve moved down to La Jolla, I visit them as often as possible. It isn’t a duty. It’s a pleasure — even when my dad beats me at golf! When I realized that I wanted to become an actor, I knew that I could level with my folks and they would take me seriously. And my dad knew that he could level with me. He had hoped I would want to go into the steel business, so we compromised. I agreed to try it. If it didn’t work out, he agreed to help me get started on an acting career. I tried. And I learned an invaluable lesson in the process. Have you ever heard the saying, “We never do anything consciously, for the last time, without sadness of heart?” A gentleman named De Quincey said it, and he was so right. I found it out. I went back to Detroit and the East to learn about the steel business. But I discovered that I still wanted to act. And I was living for the tomorrow when I’d achieve my purpose. Yet when I left to return to California, to what I hoped would be a successful acting career, I got to feeling pretty sad. I watched the city of Detroit disappear as the train sped west. I remembered the good times I’d had and the friends I’d made. I also remembered how sometimes I’d been too lost in my dreams of the future to enjoy the present. I’ve never been sorry that I planned for California, but I’ve always been sorry that I didn’t take full advantage of the enjoyable things each day offered in Detroit, because there’s always something fine about each and every day. I’ve learned. And I’m still learning. That’s why I say, don’t live for tomorrow. Live for your todays. You won’t be sorry. You’ll find you’re really living! The End EXCLUSIVE! Behind the scenes on THIS IS YOUR LIFE • Three great loves of MILTON BERLE • the Heartwarming love story of RUSSELL ARMS “PCcit Newlyweds JAYNE MEADOWS and STEVE ALLEN in the Big Issue of NOV. TV RADIO MIRROR at all newsstands