Pictures and the Picturegoer (April - September 1915)

WKBK l.MUNC Aprii FICrURiib AND THE PICTUREGOER. NKV BR run after n woman os a tramcar. There will be another one along in n minute or two. Making an Exception. "Is this a firs! class picture-house : " asked tli ■ naught] iudi> idual. "Oh. yes," answered the d 'keeper, "but wedon'1 mind admitting you." No Girl Could Do More. "And while I'm onl there trenching it you «ill sometimes think of me?" ■' Yes. Dicky darling; when I visit the • pictures ' with other boj s, I shall imagine each one is you." Ko Peace for Him. "Giles, why don'l you come to my picture-house now ? ■• For three re isons, . ur. Pusl ly, 1 do 11 like yer pictures; secondly, I dean like yer moosic; and. thirdly, it w;is in your picture'ouse i first inet mj wile." What's in a Headline? Sob Editok : '•' \ correspondent sends D9 a [nil account of a cock-tight film. It >h.i\v-; photographs of the steel spurs used, the cockpit, spectators, birds in battle, \c with every round described." (jrBE vr hnnoi; ; " Glorious ! Gel it all in." buB-EDTTOB (doubtfully . ' But this is ;i moral Sunday paper." Great Editor: " x-e-s, I know. Head it A Brutal Sport Where Were the Police ? ' ' And it was so. They didn't want him in their filmdrama, so when he walked into the studio where it was being re* hearsed the producer led him gently to the di or and pointed to the Btreet. tie came back. The leading man pushed him out. and he fell and got a black eye. He came ba< k. The propertyman rnshed at him and hurled him out. lie fell on a heap of -t> nes, and sustained a broken coilarlione. a cracked km e-cap, and three iii s fractured. He picked himself up thought over the whole matter carelully. "1 know what it is,"hegasp <\ at length; '"those people in there don't want me in their film play.' Paraphrased. The office-boy sm< othed his glossy locks. "• it you plea--. Mi--, the Film Editor is very much obliged to you for the opportunity of seeing your plots, but he much regrets he is unable to make use of them." The fair plot-writer sighed. " Did he really say that r " she a^ked. '' Er— no. Miss, not exactly. He said, 'Take away these packs of pittie and burn 'em, Joe. They make me sick;''' Thr OWsl ll v I ! . : ,ii, d in her fathei drnwi burning her fat her jwer iii'1 A ngelina,'1 cried h voice lull '^' passionate •■ irn< ss Answer me, I can bear this no longer." ■ Lnswer biin, Angelina," came h voice through the keyhole. "Answer bim L . in bear this expense no |oii| He Had Never Heard. Teddy sat frowning over the third example "A little girl had a family of dolls, bhe gave one-fourth of them a way and hail Bix left. How many did give awaj r Suddenly his face cleared ETe quietly from hie -eat and tiptoed up to the teacher, •• Will you please tell me," he whispered," how manj dolls make a family P " In the Days of our Youth. "There. Alice," said Mrs. Mumpser, proudly exhibiting a picture to the servant, "that is a portrait of your master, painted when he was a child." Alice gazed open-mouthed al tl" pro« duction. "Lor', mum.'' she -aid. after some momenta, " what a pity it i we have to grow up, ain't it !-"' N.B.— The master was one ,.f the worm-eaten, hen-pecked variety. Her Fate in Life. The young woman sat before her ulass and gazed lone and earnestly at: the reflection there. She screwed up her face in many ways. She fluffed her hair, then smoothed it down again. She raised 1km eyes, and lowered them: she showed her teeth, and she pressed her lips closely together. At last -he got up with a weary sigh, and said : " It's no use. I sha.l never have the ghosl of a chance of being a picture actress." ?r FOR FILM -LOVERS Hindsoine Picture S >uwnirs : BARNABY RUDGE THE FILM LIFE OF MARY PlCK>ORD \ daintj irl p Pi FUR B«1)DMG AUTHORS PLAY -WRITING r-OR THE CINEMA iiy KUNKST V DENCH, i'i lee i- 3d., i'"-' FOR YOUR FK1LNDS "PICTURES AND THE PILTUREGOER " I'Kli. to AUG., 101 ^ Lrtiai k ely bound, pi i HKOMIDE ENLARGEMENTS 01 MARY hULLER 1 [in. l>y lOin.' Will Frame Handso nice ya. each, tost tree. New Pos card of ELlSABtTH FISDON. Price Id., postage flxtra. V: I I lr o, i | to— "THE r-I-^TU^ES," Ltd., 19) ADAM ST., STKANP, LONDON. J SCREEN STRUCK." Both Had a Shock. Mist] ddenly entering kitchen and finding Mary on policeman's knee) -. •■ Mary. I'm surprised 1 Maiiv: "■ So am I, mum; I thought you'd gone out.'' Going! Going!! Gone!!! First Man (emerging from picture-palace) to second ditto: " What's the timer-' Second Man: "Dunno." First Ma.v: ••Ain't yer watch a-going?" S E c o x i ) M ax (t ra giea 1 1 \ ) : " Wuss ! it 'a gbrn!" A Pair of 'em. _ Scene, First-class railway viage ; three occupants navvy. knut, and an American. Navvy -mokes ';shag." Several ti the others complain of awful smell. At length the American can bear stench no longer. Train pulls up at a station ; the American hangs his head out of the window':— '• Say, guard, just remove this: gny here; he's travelling in a firstclass carriage with a third-claea ticket." The guard docs as is asked. The train starts to move again. " That was a cute way of gett i>i_? rid of an awful bore," says the knut; " but how did yon know he had a third-class ticket ? " " Wa| ! I saw the ticket sticking out of his pocket, and it was Horrible experience of a newly-married man who returns home to Bad his wi c doing this suit of thiug. Alter the fright same colour as mine, so J gu he discovered she was rehearsing for u uct tilm-drama, it was thurd-ciass. '