Pictures and the Picturegoer (April - September 1915)

April 17, 1915 :URES AND THE P1CTURECOER THE FILM OF THE MOMENT. "MAN PROPOSES, BUT-" An intensely dramatic story of the diplomatic relations between AUSTRIA and ITALY, it is a film everyone ought to see at this crisis. THREE REELS. EXCLUSIVE. LIONEL GILLING, The Omnifilm Co., 151, Wardour Street, London, W. TH E beginning of the end <>t one love affair means the beginning of the beginning of another. Quite Natural. "Johnnie, are you studying your lesBon in natural history? " Yea, father." What part of it " ••I'm reading about 'Pimple' and the Contest in the PICTURES." Sufficient Reason. •' Why do you say he i a bird r " ' Weil, he i.s cMeften-nearted and pigeon-toed, lias the habits of an owl. likes to wear a swallow-tail coat and collars with wings, he is always acting tin goose, and he is a perfect jay." Quick-change Artistes. " What a wonderful actress that lady is!" said Mr. Gibbs at the cinema. ' assented Mrs. Gibbs," she can change a laughing face into a sad face in a second." "That's nothing," squeaked Tommy Gibbs; '• m\ schoolmaster does that."' The Young and the Old. An old but clever doctor was noted for his brusque manner and old-fashioned methods. One time a lady called him in to treat her baby, who was slightly ailing. The doctor prescribed castor-oil. •' But. doctor,'' protested the young mother, "castor-oil is so old-fashioned." " .Madam." he replied," so are babii s." Not in ths Picture. A film-producer desired to bring into one of his scenes a village church noted for its beauty, and a it was near a school lie did his best to get it over before the children came out. Alas I just as he had got it nicely focussedout trooped the children, who crowded round the operator, wanting to get taken in the photograph. Suddenly a bright idea struck him. He proceeded to group the children behind the camera, ana then took his scene. " Are we all taken in ? '' eagerly asked the children. you are all taken in." said the producer, as his company departed. " Moving " Pictures. The picture-gO sr went to dine w ith ,i bachelor friend who prided himself that his few pictures were gems. After dinner they adjourned to the picturegallery, where the host, pointing out a landscape, -aid. " What do you think of that, my boy ? " The reply was hiccoughed rather than spoken •■ Bcau-ful, ol' chap fin' awfully good. Trees wave about so naturally. Whose film is it ? " Ths Damon Compositor. Lord Rosebery tells an amusing story against himself about a certain proofreader who. after he had read the proof of a particularly long speech of his lordship's, wrote at the end of it the words, " Thank Heaven ! " The proof was duly returned to the printer, who set up these words in type. The next day the speech was published in the newspaper with the following startling ending— Li At the conclusion of his speech. Lord Rosebery left for the South. Thank Heaven!" THE ZEPPELIN GLIDE. 4s .n'vica pictures London, iJudtje. Inside Information. Kind old scientist |,, |, ,, doubled id with pain : ' .M.\ little m in. what ig the mitt, i r " • i .reen apples," moaned the boy. " Y.m don!t ache," answered the Scientist, " inn only think BO." The boy looked amazed. " Vou may think so; but. oh! oh \ well you eat green apples and see if you think you ache." A False Al-arm. " You ought to have seen Mr. Marshall when he called upon Dolly the other night." remarked Johnny to his sis! young man. "He looked fine, sitting there alongside of her with his arm "Johnny: " gasped bis sister, her face the colour of a boiled lobster. " Well, so he did ! " persisted Johnnv : '" he had his arm " " John," said his father stern 1 v. " leave the room ! " And Johnny left, crying as b.8 went— " I was only going to say that he had Ins army clothes on." Undesirable Publicity. A thin, nervous-looking man approached the manager of the cinema. "You've shown us a film to-night," he observed, "about a chap that killed a man named Abel.'' '■ Cain and Abel." replied the manager. "Did you like it ? ' "Could yon do me a favour?'' asked the man. greatly excited. "Could yon flash on the screen that the man in the picture ain't no relation to the Kane that keeps a baker's down the street. I don't want none of my friends to thiuk 1 had a hand in that killm". " The Light in the Dark. '■ Can ye oblige me with a light:-" said a Scotsman, as he bit off the end of a cigar, to his companion in the stalls at the cinema. But he produced an emptj box, with apologies. Another said "he didn't smoke, and therefore' didn't carry mat (dies. "Can ye give me a light?" repeat d the Scotsman to a thud pictureg who stolidly looked at the screen said nothing. Then the Sc< tsman's finger went reluctantly into his own pocket. •" Weel. weel," he murmured, " I'll ji^t need to tak' ane o' my ain "