Radio romances (July-Dec 1945)

and frightening parts of it. Because three months ago I hadn't even known Sara Ansell, who was now Sara Howells — my wife. It had all started with the letter from Jack Howells, my cousin. I hadn't seen Jack in about five years though we'd known each other as kids, and his family had always been very kind to me, especially since my own parents died. The letter told me that his father had died and had left to Jack and to me equal partnership in the pharmacy he had owned and operated for forty years. I'd known of Uncle Jack's death of course, but the news about the drugstore was unexpected and a God-send. I'd been a pharmacist in the Navy and since my discharge I'd been looking around for a good place to settle down and be one in civilian life. Now I had a place ready-made and owned half the pharmacy besides. Nobody could have had better luck, and I felt more grateful than ever to Uncle Jack and all the Howells. They couldn't have done more for me if I'd been their own son instead of a nephew. JACK also said in his letter that if I could come to South Chester right away, I would be in time for his wedding to the girl he'd been engaged to for years. I'd never met her but I'd heard a lot about her from Jack. They'd practically grown up together, had never gone out with anybody else, and everybody had always sort of taken it for granted they'd some day be married. "The wedding is next week," he wrote, "and I'd like to have you get here as soon as possible. That way you could take over the responsibility of the store while I'm on my honeymoon." Then he added, and I can still see the words in his big, sprawling handwriting: "You'll love Sara." Well, I did. But not in the way Jack or I ever dreamed of. Sara Ansell hit me like a bolt of blue lightning the night I met her and, no matter what I did, I couldn't get over it. It was at a party at her house, the night I arrived in South Chester. Jack had met me at the train and taken me to his home where I was going to stay until I could find a place of my own, and then we'd gone to the party. He'd talked about Sara all the way. There were some people already there when we arrived, and they were admiring all the wedding presents that had been spread out in display on the diningroom table. I met Mrs. Ansell, who greeted me warmly and made me feel right at home. You could tell she was crazy about Jack; she kissed him as if he were her own son. Then she laughed and talked a while about how As Long As We Love has been adapted from "Westward Ho!" by Peg Coleman, heard on CBS Stars Over Hollywood program, Saturdays at 12:30 P.M., EWT. 30 hard it was on the mother of the bride when there was a big church wedding to plan for. "We'd planned it this way," she told me, "and we're going to have it in spite of Mr. Howells' recent death. He would have wanted it that way. He was such a fine man." And then I turned around and there was Sara, smiling up at me, waiting to be introduced. When I looked at her, her smile faded and we just stood there staring at each other. I don't think either of us said a word. It was as if everything in the world had stopped. After what might have been an hour she murmured something about being glad to meet me — Jack had talked so much about me — and then she moved away; and I — I felt I had to get out of there right away. I went out and walked around the block, twice, in the darkness. All the time I walked, I tried to shake free of it. "You're acting like a darn fool," I told myself. "What you think happened didn't happen at all because it couldn't. You can't fall in love like that. And besides, she's Jack's girl. It's just because you've been at sea a long time and haven't seen any pretty girls. Or else, you're having hallucinations." After a while I went back, and we all sat around and had refreshments and talked. I was careful not to sit close to Sara or to look at her. Then, on the way home Jack said, "Isn't she swell? She liked you, too. When I asked her she said, 'He's all you said he was, Jack, and much more besides.' " I couldn't answer. Swell, I was thinking. Swell wasn't the word — for Sara or for anything. I didn't sleep much that night. The next day Jack took me down to the store and showed me around and while we were doing that I could almost get my mind off Sara. It was a fine layout and I was proud to be partner in it. All the customers who came in Jack introduced to me, and everybody was nice and friendly and I knew I could be really happy here and really belong as I hadn't belonged anywhere since my people died. I managed to avoid Sara all day, but that evening Mrs. Howells was having the Ansells over to dinner and I couldn't very well get out of that. Sara and I sat next to each other at the table, and I don't remember a thing I ate or what anybody said. All I knew was that she was right there beside me and then I knew something else: I knew she was feeling what I did. I could tell. I don't know how, but I knew it as surely as I ever knew anything in my whole life. The whole thing was crazy, I kept telling myself the next two days. You don't fall in love with your cousin's fiancee three days before the wedding. But I had. She was all I'd ever dreamed of or wanted. I thought maybe I ought to go away — just clear out until it was all over and I had myself under control again. But I'd promised Jack to look after things while he was away. And, besides, well — I just couldn't do it. It was as bad for Sara, she told me afterwards. She was going through the same thing I was. And then the Tuesday before the wedding we kissed each other and after that there was nothing to do but admit, one to the other, that this was something tremendous and real and honest between us and ask ourselves what to do about it. After that kiss, which was like no other kiss had ever been in the whole wide world, we clung together and Sara said, half-sobbing, "I can't go through with it now! I can't marry Jack, feeling the way I do about you. I can't, Alan!" "I know," I whispered. "But Jack — what are we going to do about him?" "I've got to tell him, that's all. I don't care if the wedding is day after "i