Radio and television mirror (Nov 1939-Apr 1940)

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All that time Bob stayed at the hospital, waiting, though I went home and got what sleep I could, while Dr. Pastor observed the case. Unbearable relief came when I heard that Beatrice would live — to be followed by the sadness of Dr. Pastor's next words — "But, Hilda, as I feared — she'll be an invalid the rest of her life." I too had feared that. The surgeon can save a life, but sometimes he cannot make that life whole again. "You'll tell Mr. Warner?" Dr. Pastor asked, and I nodded. Bob came into the office a few minutes after Dr. Pastor had left. "You wanted to see me, Hilda?" he asked. "Pastor told me what a wonderful job you did on Beatrice — that you saved her life — ■" "Yes." V\0 you know what that means? "-^ That we haven't lost our chance at happiness together, after all?" "No, Bob," I said. "It doesn't mean that. There's something you don't know. Beatrice will be an invalid as long as she lives." "An— invalid ! " "We'll have to stand by her. You'll have to stand by her. You can't leave her now." He took a step toward me. and I said quickly, "No — don't, Bob. Don't make it any harder for both of us. Don't you see — when two people deny their love, as we did, they commit a sin. They have to go on paying for that sin, just as you and I — and poor Beatrice, too. though she had nothing to do with it — are paying now. There is no happiness for us, together. We condemned ourselves, ten years ago, to live the rest of our lives apart." "Hilda!" he cried. "That isn't true!" "Yes it is," I said. "I've thought it all out, Bob. I knew, even before I operated, that Beatrice — if she lived — would probably always be an invalid. I knew that whether I saved her life or not, we'd have to say good-bye to each other." "But I love you — and you love me!" he said despairingly. "I could never love you as much as Beatrice does," I answered. "You know that. Once before, I showed you that my love for you was less impor tant than my work." That was intentional brutality, an it had its effect on him. Quickly, I followed it up: "But Beatrice — why, you are her whole existence! Won't you go in to see her now. Bob. and tell her that you're ready to forget all that's happened, if she will? Make her life worth saving! That's the only way either you or I can be happy now — by giving some meaning to our existences!" Slowly a measure of understanding dawned on his face. "A meaning to existence!" he said softly. "There's always been a meaning to yours, Hilda — never to mine." After he'd gone, the tiny office seemed to close in on me — to hold everything that was left in my life. Books — files of case histories — surgical instruments in a glass case. Everything efficient, neat, orderly, sterile. There's an old proverb — "Physician, heal thyself." That's what I must do. The End. NEW LIPSTICK THAT STAYS ON From romantic France comes the formula for a new lipstick that stays on. 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