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We Were Not Too Young for Love
(Continued from page 49) Are you in the band? Are you married? Go on, you're too young to be married! Are you his wife? Gimme your autograph!"
Finally it got too much for me, and 1 started using the stage-door entrance. One night, Gordon left with me. The next day Horace Heidt told me point-blank that the "front exit" was part of the business. Autographs were good for Gordon. He felt sorry that I was afraid, but the crowd, after all, was the business. I would have to leam.
Horace was very kind, though. He explained to me that my fear was really just part of my personality. We can learn to control our personalities. I could learn to control my fear, if I worked at it. It's lucky my parents lived so far away, because I remember that — at the moment — I was close to packing my bags and giving up. That first year I must have packed and unpacked nine times!
But I did get my mother-in-law on the phone. She'd always been wonderful about advice — that is, she'd never given too much. In this case, she told me to find more to do. Go to museums, take up golf (Gordon's game), and work at liking the crowds. That's what Horace had said. So I set out to try.
I started going to more musevuns — without telling the gang where I spent my time. And I got up at six A.M. to play golf with Gordon.
Here, again, it was the strength of youth that helped me. Golf is physical, and Gordon is a physical man. Yet there had been nothing in my books about golf! I had to work to keep up with Gordon, but I was eighteen years young and had the strength. I learned to play golf.
I also found that golf courses across this countiy are beautiful early in the morning. They're quiet. There are few people. And Gordon and I learned more about one another on the golf course, early in the morning, than we'd knowTi in all the time up till then.
I had just begun to work at overcoming my shyness, when the war came. Gordon went into the Air Force as a flying cadet with $75.00 a month pay. So I needed a job.
The first thing 1 thought of was "dramatic actress," perhaps on radio. But when I went to the radio station in Springfield, Illinois, where Gordon was stationed, they didn't need me. However, one station manager said, "How about a commercial show? We might try you as a lady disc jockey. Had any experience?"
With my heart standing still, I said, "Yes, I can do it."
"Good," the station manager said, "you can open the station tomorrow morning at five A.M.!"
Yes, I opened the station at five A.M. I turned the key that connected tos to the Blue Network. Then I gave the morning news, read commercials, ran the discjockey show (four to five hours a day) and, in between, learned what makes a radio station go.
In the process, I was learning how to let down, to meet people and make friends. The stint at the station was great for my personality. My shyness began to melt.
When Gordon came out of the service, we had a radio show together. It was a situation comedy. I wrote it and played a part on it, as a teenager. When I became too pregnant to fit the part, we had to give it up. But I remember it as our happiest years to that time.
With the arrival of Meredith, our first child, I gave up performing. Then, while
Heather and Gar were arriving, Gordon was working at the studios. It wasn't until this present season, when we went on the road together, that I realized I was out of practice.
Because I hadn't been working at it, I was once again shy in front of an audience. I was eager to rehearse with Gordon all day, if necessary, in order to get my part of the act perfect — and in order to overcome my lack of confidence. But there wasn't time, because of Gordon's picture commitments. The first night we went on the stage, I trembled like a kitten in the cold. I knew something would happen.
It did. During a turn I broke the heel of my shoe. Crack! To me, it soimded like a pistol shot of doom. And, when the heel split, my confidence split with it. I stood there tongue-tied, thinking, I'll never go on the stage again!
One thing early marriage had taught me was: you had to learn to adjust to new situations. You've got to be "elastic." With one shoe on and one shoe off, I found myself in a new situation. I would have to adjust — but what should I do? I smiled at the broken shoe and started singing to the tune instead of dancing. The audience thought this was great fun — and laughed. As far as I was concerned, that was the proper reaction.
I feel that "being able to adjust" is one of the most important things parents can teach their children. I think our children, Meredith, Heather, and Gar, are learning to do just this — I hope!
I remember once on the tour, the audience clapped for the children to sing along with us. Gar showed how easily he could adjust. The children had three choruses of "Doggie in the Window" prepared and, when asked, showed no hesitancy about performing. When they reached the second chorus, however, young Gar's meraory failed him. But he wasn't bothered. In place of the words he laughed through the second and third choruses. I call that "well-adjusted."
Outside of this, and the shoe incident, nothing else dramatic happened during the first six weeks of our tour. Then, one day in Montreal, Gordon made a statement that completely threw me. "Sheila," he said, "did you know that you haven't sung sharp or flat 07ice in our first six weeks? Everybody in the band thinks it's terrific — especially for a beginner!"
This was a case where ignorance was bliss. I had never realized that every singer gets "frogs" in his throat once in a while. As soon as Gordon said that, I began to feel the muscles in my throat contract.
"I wish you hadn't told me," I said. Before we went on stage that night, I knew I would get off key.
I did.
Gordon laughed. "You're flat," he said.
"Oh!" was all I could say, but I felt like crying. Nobody else seemed to notice! I quickly used Gordon's favorite remedy — sm.iling. Smiling, I found, relaxed some of the muscles in the throat. I was once again on key.
So these incidents, I hope, go to prove my point. Young marriages are good for three reasons: Youngsters have more physical stamina — to open a radio station at five A.M., for example; they have shorter memories — and forget last week's trials or the fact that they were going to run home to Mother; and finally, they can adjust easily. Their youth has fitted them to sing life's song. But, if they should forget the words, then — like my son, Gar — they are better prepared to laugh at the second and third chorus.
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