The record changer (Mar 1945-Feb 1946)

MR. BROWN SHIRT-TAIL STOMP. One of our good friends had a peculiar dream which we submit to the scrutiny of both psychoanalysts and jazz lovers. He dreamed he wanted to buy a shirt and went to a very smart haberdashery. The salesman showed him several shirts, none of which he liked. Finally he was offered a yellow shirt with red stripes, which pleased him immensely. "This shirt," the salesman said, "will give you great satisfaction because as soon as you'll wear it, it will start playing the Okeh version of Dippermouth Blues by King Oliver." Our friend was delighted, rushed home with his newly acquired shirt and tried it on. The music started playing and he felt robbed. It was the King Oliver band all right, but they were playing the Okeh version of High Society. His disappointment didn't last long however, because the famous clarinet solo, in which Dodds now introduced many sensational variations, was the best music he had ever heard in his life. He played it over and over again, fell in love with the clarinet part and was happy to keep the shirt. * * * MILNEBURG JOYCE. We have been following with interest the great controversy about Bunk Johnson that is raging throughout the country. An incredible amount of irrelevant statements have been made on this subject by irrelevant people. We acknowledge that we have esoteric tastes and habits. This confession, perhaps, is superfluous, as our love for such esoteric masters as Emanuel Swedenborg and Ferdinand Morton is well known. Anyway, while perusing the other day through a volume written by that esoteric Dubliner, James Joyce, we were surprised and gratified to find a paragraph that should settle once and for all the violent controversies about that esoteric New Iberian, Bunk Johnson: "The rye is well for whose amine! but the wheateny one is proper lovely. BENK ! We sincerestly trust that Missus with the kiddies of sweet Gorteen has not BINK to their very least tittles deranged if in BUNK and we gresiously augur for your Meggers a BENK BANK BONK to sloop in with all sorts of adceterus and adsaturas." (Finnegan's Wake, p. 379.) The opening words of this quotation indicate beyond the shadow of a doubt that Joyce is referring to musicians. His analysis makes more sense to us than the uninspired opinions of our voluble musicologists. * * * ON CONTEMPORARY ETHICS. The old argument that jazz music is corrupting the youth of this country never impressed us. Good jazz, we feel certain, is precisely what the adolescents and the awkward-agers need to reach the higher levels of morality. We are not so sure, though, about the impact of vulgar swing music upon the consciousness of immature creatures. A friendly Cakewalk, it seems to us, would arouse the proper social instincts so much more than wild jitterbugging. These stray thoughts occurred to us in our dentist's waiting-room while we were reading a story by Captain Jack Tucker entitled My Name is Barbara Brian, in the January 27, 1945 issue of the Saturday Evening Post, and especially when we came to the following section : "We were all sitting on the front porch — • mama is social and calls it the veranda — when George opened the gate and walked in. One look at him and my heart began playing the Two O'clock Jump." WHAT MAKES YOUR HEAD SO HARD ? Against our better judgment, we consented (condescended would be a better word) the other day to lend a tortured ear to the newest hip record that's sweeping the country, Woody Herman's Caldonia. One of our acquaintances, a member of the progressive school, thought this record established a new high in truly modern music. Being well-mannered we were able to refrain ourself from any insulting remark. Our acquaintance was especially enthusiastic about the trombone solo played, he informed us, by one Bill Harris. He insisted in asking our opinion on the merits of this obscure musician. Unable to get a reaction from us, he then inquired as to how we thought some of the better known critics would appraise this trombonist. These are the results of our little game: 1 JAZZBO BROWN From Memphis Town 8