Reel Life (Sep 1913 - Mar 1914)

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f Tooter," said the irate pa J rent, calling upon the S school mistreiss, ani-'d I H have come in to say to s you that if you ever — " J "Don't worry, Mr. Marrow H fat," said Miss Tooter, gra S ciously. "I'm not at all j likely to do it. The jani H tor has been through all g the department stores in g town, and he can't find a H box big enough for the pur S pose." — Harper's Weekly. B Different g Grammercy — So your g wife is going to sue for a B divorce. Did she meet her S affinity while away in the H country? g Park — No. When she J came back she met mine. B — Judge. H Unappreciated "See, John," said Mrs. Slathers, with a happy smile, "I have taught the canary every time I come near him to stick out his little bill to be kissed." "Humph!" said Slathers, eyeing the bird critically. "Seems to me you spend your time teaching creatures how to present their bills for my attention. I got one from your milliner this morning, not to mention a dozen or two others in the same mail." — Harper's. Retort Courteous "My son Willie tells me that you threatened to box his ears yesterday, Miss Love Sickness at Sea Keystone