Screenland (May–Oct 1927)

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The Queen's English Continued from page 21 she had been telephoning to me from down stairs. "Ah," I said "There you are." "Can I dis you give?" said she graciously offering her hand. I took her hand and returned her smile with one of my own which, for beauty, considerably underated hers. "You are sitting?" said she. "I am not but will," said I suiting the action to the word and plunging at once into my duty. "What do you think of our tall build' ings?" I asked as a starter. She threw me a gypsy smile: "Ven mans and vomans are marry," she answered "De vomans are not like mans iss. He are vork in the day all She are affect somsing for beautiful making. It are so?" "Then you think, from what you've seen of life, that marriage is not so successful?" I asked her. "Ven are sitting," she answered, "Can talking." She put a long tapering finger on my arm and I didn't feel so easy in my mind. "Mans are not like the womans who are affect," said she. "De mans are vear all day de business and de vomans are for dressing von hour, two fifty. Are hotsy, totsy evrasing," she laughed a rippling laugh full of merriness. "Ven in Hollywood I are vorking. I am de automobiles learning to driving. Ven the driving are not so goot, not can driving goot. In de street von ladys are I pushing down. De vomans are vit me angry. Bot I are speaking English so I to her say 'Totsy Totsy' and are so quick away driving." "I understand," I lied. "But tell me, do you enjoy your work in pictures here better than in Europe?" "De vompire," she exclaimed quite easily. "De vompire always are get de mans. Bot he are quick avay to some telephone and are forgetting all about." "Aha," said I. "Then you like to play vampire parts better than . . . " "Oh yes," she said. "Ven I are playing in Budapest, Mister Goldwyn are to me a telegram 'Coming quic\ to Paris.' He are telegram. I are excite. Ven I are in Paris coming, Mister Goldwyn vant for I am vompire playing. Bot I are like to play nize vomans." "Nize baby," said I if a little jocularly. "No," she exclaimed. "I are re-fuse Mister Goldwyn." "Do you like Hollywood better than you do New York?" I next asked. "I are not so intelgent, bot I are not dumbull," she answered. "What I mean is," said I, "Do you like the people in Hollywood any better than . . .?" "You be not so sure," she said. "Perhaps," I answered ambiguously. "Here are sometimes yes and sometimes not so goot," she said. "I see," I said. "Six of one and sex of the other." "Bot, no," she said. "What I want to know is," said I, "Do you like European or American men better?" "It are in America vonderful big," she told me. "Taller, you mean?" "Oh my Gott," she exclaimed, "Only motch more vindow." 'Windc "It are vonderful," she agreed. "Do you mean buildings, or men?" "You are me joking," she said laughingly. "Are not so big the ice?" "No," I hastened to assure her. "My drink is cold enough." Then seeing the error of my ways and hastening to regain my lost advantage, I added: "I think your eyes are adorable . . . but your nose ..." "My noce it are for the distinction," said she and she turned on me her beautful broadside — the broadside that I would guarantee to sink a thousand battleships. "The nose have it," I said. "Oh my Got," she said laughing full heartedly, "Dis Henglish linguidge are hotsy totsy." "How many languages do you speak?" I asked remembering that most foreigners speak three or four. C[ Viola Dana in "The Winds of Chance" puts the sea in Cinema.