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for May 19 3 1
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The Girl Stood on the Burning Deck
Continued from page 39
chopped parsley to the top and fear nobody.
The beauty of most of my recipes is that you can make them in a mining camp where there is only one store. You don't have to go to a special importer's on an avenue named after a street commissioner to buy what you want. Obviously this keeps your mortgage down. The simple and cheap foods are often the best. Take my now famous codfish balls.
Codfish Balls
Everybody knows the brand of codfish which arrives in a plain wooden box minus all frills. Open one of these unostentatious containers, and remove the contents. At this stage the appetite remains limp. You are at the poor fish stage. That, however, is only the beginning. Even a painting requires background work before the real picture emerges. It is necessary to soak the codfish for thirty minutes or more, drain off the water, then boil until tender in a saucepan of fresh water. Drain the water again, being sure it is all off. Shred the fish carefully and add mashed potatoes equal to the amount of fish used. Beat up an egg, add one teaspoonful of baking powder, combine with the codfish and potato, make balls or cakes, drop them into very hot, deep fat, brown, then drain the grease from the balls on heavy paper. Serve immediately garnished with watercress or what have you, and I promise you that nobody will leave the table while a single ball remains on the plate.
Goose
Another of my favorite dishes is goose.
I've always wondered why people are so afraid to cook one. I take this perfectly tractable fowl, dry it inside and out, rub it like mad with black pepper, fill it with apples, and permit it to cook in its own fat until brown. Then I have goose — and believe me, sauce for this goose is sauce tor any gander.
Oysters
Another of my suggestions for keeping men home — if you have nothing better — is the oyster stew. Never stew about this stew. Just oysters, a big lump of butter, seasoning and cream. The worst is over quick. On such occasions men have actually been known to part with money without using a fountain pen dropper. Oysters, they tell me, are easily digested and full of many things, including those necessities named after the alphabet which everyone is chasing just now and which in some miraculous way we managed without before some sap hit upon the word vitamin. Now you can't really enjoy any food because you're so busy wondering if A, B, C, D, E, and all the rest are absent. It seems if you don't eat one of these letters, your teeth fall out; the lack of another letter makes you blind ; without another letter you can't send any little Susies and Johnnies out into the world. It was bad enough to learn the alphabet without having to eat it, but it does help when it comes in tasty form. An oyster broiled or baked in the shell with a strip of bacon on top and plenty of seasoning is not only the piece de resistance at Antoine's, the famous New Orleans restaurant, but it starts a meal well anywhere. The same can be said of scalloped oysters. Oysters, cracker crumbs, butter, seasoning and milk thrown together and baked in the oven until brown on top is an idea for next Sunday night if you have to stay home. We
predict that the boy-friend who has been reluctant up to this time will decide that he can make more than thirty-five dollars a week if he has good food at home to give him some pep. A general hint to the uneducated is that the less an oyster is cooked the better.
Still another suggestion which I makegratis to the menujaded housewife is:
A Regular Cut-Up
Take some pigeons cut up (if the pigeons are pets, order something else for dinner. If labelled butcher's squab, proceed with a clear conscience), add mushrooms cut up, veal kidneys cut up, onions cut up, pepper, salt, spices and a bay leaf. (I'm a real daughter of Eve. I always have a leaf handy.) Simmer slowly in water for a long time — then eat it. I promise that you will either cut up or coo !
Frozen Salad
My pet salad consists of an empty green pepper packed solid with cream cheese and chopped nuts, then frozen in the icebox. I next slice this and place the slices on lettuce leaves, covering the whole with French dressing. When I say lettuce leaves, I mean crisp lettuce leaves, not the discouraged looking stuff that some people put on their plates and that not even a chicken would peck at. The vitality of the cook is shown by the condition of the lettuce. If it is limp, be sure that the cook is absolutely lacking in sex appeal.
It is impossible to give all my recipes, but in general I have several suggestions to offer. First, I like a dash of onion in everything — I don't practise breath control. Onions, like perfumes, should never be obvious. A subtle touch, as it were, back of the ear. Sneak up behind the other ingredients with the chopped onion and then insinuate it. Let it come on like a chorus supporting the star. Just a merry villager when celery is singing tenor and the tomato yodeling high notes in soprano. A delicate bay leaf is the ingenue and should have her bit. Onions are the comedians of the cooking pot, but while they furnish fun for the palate they must never interfere with the love interest of the plot.
Another idea of mine is that people cook vegetables and eggs too long. Never cook an egg to death. Put it on, take it off, give it to your guests and lie back. Still another of my conceits is whipping mild horseradish into mayonnaise combined with whipped cream. It's as effective as the ruche around a widow's crepe. Try it the next time that you make a date with a tomato.
Today I scarcely ever have time to cook because Mamie knows exactly what I want before I do and the viands await me without any worry on my part. I must stop right here to tell you about Mamie. Placed end to end over eighteen years, Mamie and I almost establish a statistic or at least reach from coast to coast. She is the paragon for whom every woman searches in the want ads. She is the priestess of my kitchen and my chink-filler. She told a friend of mine the other day: "Miss Dressier is a darned good woman and can't be beated. Look for a long time — you'll never find another. That's from the heart. To show you how much I think of Miss Dressier, I left my husband to come West with her." Just look at the woman who would like to be able to do that ! Well. Mamie's got her husband with her out here now and all's as it should be in our
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