Screenland (Nov 1934-Apr 1935)

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for February 1935 You would he graciously "received" by Swanson, with that slight edge of "royalty unbending" that still clings to Gloria's manner. Don't, however, mention the word "comeback" to La Swanson.' That would never do. Believe it or not, you can flirt a little bit with Ronnie Colman, above! But Maurice Chevalier, right, just doesn't "meet" well. Read the reason. If you just can't manage to be a relative to someone who matters or have a friend who has a friend who is on social footing with the elite, the only other approach is the fan-album-in-hand-I've-always-admired-your-work-so-much system at the Yendome or one of the various Brown Derbys. Gate-crashing is absolutely frowned upon, and ringing home door-bells or calling up over the telephone is a direct cut to ostracization. In fact, it is downright "pest-y" and will rate you nothing but a door in the face or a receiver in the ear from even the most approachable celeb. The second rule is to pick your star — in other words, there's nothing like meeting someone who will be met, and surprisingly enough there are plenty of them. If I were you I'd skip Greta Garbo or Katharine Hepburn for my first encounter with a star in the flesh because Greta is still her frightened-faun self, and so is Kathie Hepburn, by gum ! Off-hand I can think of no one better to start with than Joan Crawford, for if Joan is not the most cordial stellar person in Hollywood to meet, she's so close to it you can skip the difference. Joan not only smiles and bows to the crowds that line-up after previews and before dinners, she actually shakes hands and calls "Hello" right back ! But there's one little trick of standing out from the crowd so far as Joan is concerned — something that will set you apart from the other meeters and greeters — and that is, a sincere handclasp and a remark that is personal to her, and could not apply to any other ermine-coated celebrity present. Then, indeed, you have Joan's undivided attention! If you can prove that you have been writing her letters for years and years and have always adored her on the screen and that she has been something of an inspiration in your life, you need not worry that you'll bore her. Tears have actually welled in Joan's eyes following an effusive tribute from a stranger. She is so touched she usually murmers "God bless you" — and you rate ace-high with her ever after. Ten-to-one she'll get your address, write you a nice letter and send an autographed picture. On the other hand, I wouldn't try "inspiration" on Connie Bennett. Effusiveness bothers Connie and gets in her sleek (Continued on page 95)