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How to Raise a Boy in Hollywood
Continued from page 29
able to judge for himself as to the Tightness and the wrongness of the young ladies he escorts. Only once did I disapprove of a girl that Jackie asked to our home. While she was our guest, I had a chance to observe and study her. She claimed she was only sixteen, but I doubted that very much. I felt that she was too old and sophisticated. When Jackie returned, after taking the girl home, he was excited and elated about her. He, as he always has, asked me what I thought of her. We talked for a while, and I told him I didn't really care for her, that she was not sincere or truthful. Jackie was vitally disappointed at first, and as I watched him go to his room that night, I knew exactly what was on his mind. In his slow, plodding steps I could tell he was hurt a little and emotionally confused. But it was his fight, his judgment. I voiced my opinion and left the rest up to him. I knew what his decision would be, for Jackie has never gone against my advice. The next morning his mind was clear. He never saw her again.
When Jackie was young and when he went through the puppy-love era, I never laughed at him. I tried to understand how a young boy his age felt and to talk to him in a way that he would grasp quickly. I didn't talk dou'ii to him though. I talked with him and helped him to see where he was wrong and where he was right.
Ever since he was six years old, he has had a girl friend, so you can see we've had a good many confidential sessions. His first crush was Mitzi Green. This came when he was making "Skippy." One day he came home to me, crying as though his heart would break. After I managed to calm him, he told mc how awful it was to be too young to marry. He wanted to marry Mitzi so badly. I didn't laugh at him. I comforted him and told him not to worry, that he could marry her when he grew up. Jackie felt much better about it after I had given my "consent" and assured me he would always love her.
That eventually passed, as I knew it would. But it wasn't long before he was back in the same throes again and a bit more intense about his new crush. She was Helen Parrish, Universal starlet today. Jackie was eight at the time. He used to take Helen to Saturday matinees, accompanied by his body-guard. He bought her several gifts, all out of his allowance which at that time was one dollar a week. He remained in his youthful seventh heaven for quite awhile, but eventually this waned too.
But, ever since those early and impressionable stages in Jackie's life, he has never been without a girl friend. We have always entertained them, along with his boy friends, at our home. Consequently, there has never been any novelty to his having a girl. There has never been that awful confusion and fright that confront many boys who have not associated with or been around girls. Jackie was taught that it was natural to be with them. That his friendship with them was fine and part of his normal training. I haven't felt that he should be segregated from girls until he reached a riper age. Such an idea, to me, is the cause of many embarrassments between young boys and girls of today.
I don't want to be misunderstood in this connection. Jackie has never been allowed to do entirely as he wishes when it comes to going with girls. I always know where he goes and what he does. For example, he and Judy Garland have been the closest of friends on and off for five years. They don't go around together so much now.
Their interests are different. But in the days past they had many good times. Naturally, they would quarrel and break up, and then they would start going out together again. I never paid any particular attention, only to know in a casual way what was going on.
Often, after he and a girl have quarreled, Jackie has come to me looking for sympathy and understanding. When such moments occur, we go to my room and talk the whole '':hing over. He tells me what happened, what his part in the argument was, and then asks for my advice. I talk to him quietly and with understanding, and soon we come to the solution that eases his mind. I am very grateful that Jackie has come to me for this help voluntarily. There has been no embarrassment in talking to me. He does so freely and honestly. He wouldn't be able to if we hadn't been as close as we are and so honest with each other.
In fact, when Jackie returns from a date, he always tells me all about the evening, just as soon as he comes home. He tells me where he went, whom he saw, what he and the girl did, what gave him the most pleasure, and anything else that pops into his head at such times. This may sound as though Jackie has no secrets from me. As far as I know, he hasn't. But then, everyone has had a few very personal secrets that he has kept from his mother and father, so I expect Jackie has too. I have no desire to know what they are. He has a right to them. If he ever wants to talk to me about them, that is his business.
Some mothers find their children's questions embarrassing. I never have. Principally, I assume, because from the very first question Jackie asked me, I tried to be honest in my answer. I have never lied to him. Sometimes I had to be diplomatic or make comparisons in some other phase of life, but he has always been told everything straight. Such honesty pays in the long run and brings about a better and more definite basis of understanding and accord between mother and son. It is better that a boy's mother answer his questions tactfully and honestly than that he should learn the answers from less creditable sources.
Today, Jackie has no steady girl, but his current interest — call it romance if you wish — is Jimmy Rogers. Yes, I know Jimmy is a peculiar name for a girl, but that doesn't prevent her being a very fine young lady. She's the daughter of Jarvis Rogers, ranch owner in Palm Springs. She is an excellent rider — in fact, she lives on a horse — and she is quite adept at roping steers. With all of these athletic abilities, though, she is quite feminine and lovely, though perhaps not as sophisticated as the girls Jackie has known in Hollywood. He met her on one of our frequent visits to the desert resort. He became so intrigued by her skill that he immediately took an interest in her and made up his mind to ride as well as she could, and even to rope steers as well. I suppose it was the old idea of a "man" never wanting a "woman" to do anything better than he could. Well, anyway, Jackie entered his first rodeo a while back and rode his first steer, with some success, I must admit. I can't say he was entirely at ease, but he did an excellent job considering that he was new at it.
Jackie and Jimmy are together constantly while we're in Palm Springs. He kids her a lot about being unsophisticated. When he asks her if she wants to go to a movie, she'll reply indifferently, "I don't
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