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MUSIC
COMPOSED TO POEMS
Send poem for consideration. Rhyming pamphlet free. Phouogi-aph electrical transcriptions made, ?7.00 from your word and music manuscript. Any subject considered, Love, Home, Sacred, Swing
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so terribly tolerant. We'll be in a restaurant or night-club and I'll look up and see some woman who annoys me. I'll come right out with, 'I don't like that dame.' Jack will say, 'Now, Doll, you mustn't be like that. She did the most marvelous thing the other day.' Then he'll tell me how she gave a hundred thousand dollars to the Community Chest, or how she helped a little lame boy across the street — and in spite of myself I'll end up liking her. I have never heard Jack say he disliked anybody. I wish he would sometime, just to break the monotony."
Jack gets up early every morning in the year, no matter whether he's working or not. None of that sissy reclining and having breakfast in bed. The first thing he does when he is dressed is to go in to see Joanie, his little adopted daughter, and together with Lady, Joanie's dog, they go for a romp that > is extremely trying on the plastering. If it's a day that Jack doesn't have to work on a picture or a script he will put on his sweatshirt after breakfast, pick up his trainer, and drive down to Santa Monica Beach where he likes to exercise in the sand. After a shower and a light lunch he will either drive over to the club for a game of golf with one of his pals, or else he and Joanie will go shopping in the big department stores down in Los Angeles. They are very companionable, those two, and they have the very same sense of humor. After they have done the toy department thoroughly they invariably end up in the men's department where Jack will splurge on a few socks and ties. Which will go right back to the shop the next morning.
"I don't know what happens to Jack when he gets in a shop," says Mary. "He brings home socks and ties in the most awful colors and designs. I have to take them all back and select new ones for him. Except for his socks and ties, however, Jack picks out all his clothes and has wonderful taste. I don't think anybody in the world looks as handsome as Jack does in a double-breasted blue suit and a hat. Or maybe I'm just a little prejudiced."
At five in the afternoon (when he isn't working, of course) Jack has a massage and a short nap until dinner time. Several nights a week they have dinner with the Taylors — Barbara and Bob being their best friends. _ Jack is always pleased to see a good juicy steak set before him — though if he had his way he'd have a bowl of chili every night in the week. After dinner Jack and Bob play pool if they are at the Taylors, or they all go to a movie (Jack's quite a keen movie fan), or maybe they'll just sit around and talk for hours. Jack is very fond of Barbara. "If I tell Jack he looks run-down and ought to see a doctor, he just laughs at me," says Mary, "but when Barbara pitches into him, he says, 'You're right, Barbara, I'll have the doc look me over tomorrow.' "
Jack is an unusual man in more ways than one. He is crazy about his mother-inlaw. Mary's mother and father live very near the Bennys in Beverly Hills and Jack, according to Mary, had rather eat with them than eat at home. "You should see Jack with my mother," she says. "The minute he gets home from the studio he rushes over to see her to tell her the newest story he heard on the set that day. They laugh and scream and think they're the funniest people alive." Mary's mother likes to tell about the day when Mary, age twelve, got furious with Jack Benny, because he called her a baby, and swore she'd get even with him if it was the last thing she did. "She did," says Jack, nudging his mother-in-law in the ribs. "She got even, all right. She married me." And then they go off into more gales of laughter.
Jack's first job in the theater was as a doorman. Next he became a property man. Then he became a violin player, believe
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