Screenland ((Jan–Jun 1947))

mind. These things she tried to instil in me. Thanks to her, I have never found older people boring. To the contrary, I have great patience with them — they stem so full of wisdom." Other memories along the way — those eventful five years when he won a scholarship with the great teacher and actor, Michael Chekov (remember him as the elderly psychiatrist in "Spellbound"?) . Crossing on the Normandie, feeling freedom for the first time in England, no one to discourage him, knowing he was really going to be an actor. All life before him. "It was various, diverse, like a ballet." At 18, hopelessly, desperately in love! "It wasn't romantic. We had a quarrel and I was depressed and unhappy. It was wet and damp, I took a long walk over the moors. Finally, I got back to Dartmouth by the ocean, wandered around, kept staring and looking into windows. Riding back home on the bus, my corduroys were soaking wet. How I hated life at that moment! Then a little old lady took my arm, led me into a dreary little cubicle and offered me a cup of coffee. I brightened up. "Surrounding me were boozies who dozed happily. They asked me to make a testimony, then they shouted 'Welcome, brother' and I was taken into the fold. Having plenty of money, I decided to play the mysterious stranger, left them a five pound note, went back and had a final scene with my girl. I decided I could live after all. She's married now and has two children. I still think she was wonderful." Restless, intense, feverishly ambitious, Hurd was seldom idle until he succeeded in Hollywood. Crowded though the moments have been, indelible are the sights, sounds, people, places, and things that managed to impress or depress his sensitive nature. "I'm fond of life and people — not just people in general, but people with individuality. I like to be around these individuals, though sometimes I promise myself that I'm going to be alone and meditate. Then I find I can't. I loathe mobs and mob psychology. Once I was caught New Year's Eve in Times Square. Being a part of an undifferentiated mass, I had great awareness of psychological darkness, a great sense of peril from people functioning. It was ghastly. Analyzing this reaction, I think I resented losing my own feeling of individuality. "I'm fond of animals, especially, dogs. Especially cocker spaniels. I like beer, Maggie Teyte's tremendously exciting way of singing French art songs. I think fans are wonderful, I admire their faithfulness and affection. I like playing and collecting records, drawing and sketching, especially clowns. I paint rarely as it usually disgusts me. Takes me a week before I hit it. I love my father's quietness and his love of reading. My mother's gaiety, the genuine pleasure she gets out of pleasure. "I'm sensitive about criticism because Hatfield Looks Ahead Continued from page 42 I hate to do things badly. But I value honest criticism. I know I have a serious appearance, but I believe myself to be a clown. I'm idiotically crazy amongst my close friends. I'm shy in front of people I know slightly. I hate being pushed, does something to the dignity of human beings. Like the time I was knocked down in front of the 21 club in New York. "I was signing autographs. I was impressed and flattered at first. Then the kids started pushing so hard, ink got all over me. They continued until I fell down. There I was, up to my ears in gutter water, giving autographs. My dignity lasted just so long. Slightly battered, I got up, organized the whole thing. Made them stand in line and get autographs one at a time. "I like different circles of friends and not just actors. You can't talk that way. I dislike parlance. Local colloquialisms have created a whole new language in Hollywood. I love New York, couldn't live without it. My favorite weekends are spent at Ojai. I love it when it's either very good or very bad. I hate it when it's mediocre. I feel like an alchemist of some kind, mixing my friends from New York, Ojai, and Hollywood. "I despise diletantism. It haunted me when I was young. Because I could paint a little, I was haunted by the idea that I was restless, a dabbler, not really a talented person. I love the color orange. People ofttimes misunderstand me because I seem more serious than I am. They think I'm kind of a long face. Opening nights in the theater fascinate me like reptiles. Hollywood premieres sometimes embarrass me. "I'm also fascinated backstage in the theater, the singing of Josh White, the negro guitarist, calm seas, looking out the French windows overlooking the Park in our New York apartment, the stars during summer, Elizabeth Bergner, who once wanted me to play opposite her. To me she is an actress in a special realm. I like white rugs, walking in the rain (that sounds so dreary — everyone says it, no one ever does it) . One of my favorite books is 'Letters to a Young Poet' by Rilke. My favorite review, the play was called 'The Possessed.' I looked like Jack the Ripper and played the role of a half-crazed engineer who commits suicide. The critic said, 'Unfortunately Mr. Hatfield committed suicide in the fourteenth, instead of the first scene!' I've always remembered that review, especially when a critic has been unusually enthusiastic. "Like most people when seeking advice, I seldom apply it. That's pretty horrible but I guess I'm actually bad at taking advice, unless it's from higher up. Being late depresses me. I suppose I lack a sense of time or can't realize its importance. I procrastinate about little things, lack a driving will-power, and have learned to substitute with concentration, hate saying no to anything (what am I saying!) . 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