Screenland (Nov 1950-Oct 1951)

dollar value giant size... 69^ Finest creme shampoo you have ever used... or money back. Why pay a dollar? Guaranteed by Helene Curtis-foremost "DARK-EYES" Dept. HJ1 3319 Carroll Ave., Chicago 24, III. I tnclou 26c (coin or ilimw m included) for . TRIAL 1 PACKAGE of "LtarkEreV1 with directions. I Check Shade: □ Black □ Brown • Name . I A ddress • Town State 56 ing and furnishing a new home. As is customary in such cases, our three-year-old son, David, decided that he wanted a model automobile for Christmas. Sue did the shopping and found two: one was reasonably priced, one was expensive. She had both small automobiles sent out to the house and asked me to make the decision. Oh well, suppose I did choose the expensive one. A boy never forgets his first motor-powered toy automobile, so it should be durable. After Sue and I have been through a particularly expensive period in our lives, she always announces a new program of economy. "We'll have to be careful for at least six months," she says, looking very solemn. And for several weeks she goes through the house, turning off what she regards as superfluous lights. After Christmas each year we move about in semi-darkness for months. A well-known authority on domestic relations recently published an article entitled "Until Children Do Us Part." As might be expected, the theme of the article was that a marriage is jeopardized if the welfare of the family's children is placed, by either parent, above that of the other parent. Children are so helpless and their needs are so clearly defined that it is sometimes easy to forget that their coming has not altered the very real needs of both parents. Great as the love of a child is, it can never really replace or compensate for the lost love of a mate. Sue and I have tried never to lose sight of the fact that much as we love our youngsters, they are individuals with lives of their own which they must live. We try to give them all the comforts, love and guidance of which we are capable, but their generation is not ours. I have heard many a woman, when asked by her husband to accompany him on a business trip, answer tersely, "You know I can't go. I have the responsibility of the children and can't possibly leave them," in spite of the presence in the home of a competent nurse or grandmother who could be trusted with the physical care of the youngsters for a few weeks. Such a woman forgets that after the children have gone on to make their own places in the world, parents are left alone together. Whether this situation initiates a prolonged second honeymoon, or whether it results in two strangers facing one another across an expanse of lonely table, depends upon how the years of child-rearing have been spent. Although Sue is an excellent mother, my welfare is her first consideration at all times. Conversely, I try to be a good father, but Sue's happiness is my greatest trust. As I have said before, a system that works for one couple may not work for another. However, we have found that one of the facets of our marriage which has given us many bright moments is that, in addition to being husband and wife, we are one another's best friend. If a husband's first reaction when he hears a bit of news is, "I must telephone my wife right away," there is little that can go wrong with the marriage, par ticularly if the wife is at home to answer the call. Also, if a wife never discusses her home problems and never reviews the shortcomings or peculiarities of her husband at her woman's club, or over luncheon with her closest woman friend, she is not likely, also, to have to tell her troubles to a judge. In the matter of keeping confidence within a family, I think the average man is more reliable than the average woman. I seldom hear a man air his domestic difficulties; a man would rather discuss politics, sports, or professional problems. However, I must admit that a great many men have been uncomfortable listeners while a pretty dinner party companion has laid bare her troubled heart. This sort of thing doesn't happen when both husband and wife regard their union as a closed corporation. A funny thing happened several years ago when I was being interviewed by a newspaper reporter. I was asked when I was inducted into the Army. I gave it some thought, then answered, "We must have been inducted in. . . ." The reporter interrupted to ask, "What do you mean by 'We must have been inducted. . . :?" I began to grin. I felt a little sheepish, but I had to explain that by "we," I meant Sue and me. Our association has been so close that when I went into uniform, I felt that Sue was also getting her basic training. I think I would have been guilty of the most delayed double-take in history if, when I came home on weekend pass, Sue had met me wearing khaki. It would have seemed so logical that I might have taken it as a matter of course. I think this represents a fine example of comradeship within marriage. Finally, it seems to me that an important element of satisfactory matrimony is the maintenance of a spirit of adventure. Life consists of the four major adventures: being born, attaining maturity, marrying and dying. In the midst of these four, the average human being is privileged to experience an unlimited series of minor adventures, yet I am constantly impressed by the numbers of people who do not realize or profit by this fact. Women, particularly, are inclined to think that marriage consists of settling down and working furiously to earn a home, a collection of fine furniture and a good car, and raising a family. The woman wants tangibles, and she does not intend to endure "shiftlessness" in her man. In many such cases, the husband feels cheated by his relegation to a place as mere means to satisfy a woman's ambition. Denied his wife's comradeship in fresh experiences, he sets out — consciously or unconsciously — in quest of a comrade less interested in the trappings of domesticity, more interested in the man himself. Each of us is made up of a series of dreams. Some of the dreams, admittedly, are foolish, but in the midst of the nonsense there may be one dynamic, vivid idea that dominates everything