The screen writer (Apr-Oct 1948)

fice, and later in the day a very crummy old desk was delivered there for mv use. TOURING the next two or three -*-'' weeks I saw Mr. Gripes on many occasions. Every day Miss Hepplethwaite made coffee for Mr. Gripes in his office (or rather my office) and on several occasions I was invited to join them. I should perhaps state that during these weeks Mr. Gripes was friendly in a hearty but rather patronizing manner. He frequently inquired of me how The Marinated Corpse was coming along and volunteered to "kick the idea around" with me. However, when I inquired of him how the Burner story was coming along Mr. Gripes was consistently uncommunicative. I am quite satisfied, in the light of what happened subsequently, that Mr. Gripes was deliberately attempting during these conversations to 'pump' me and that he already, then, had plagiarism in view. These are not idle charges ; I will substantiate them fully when I relate the details of what took place later. At this stage I feel the Committee is entitled to know of a further development. Out of consideration for the feelings of Mrs. Zilch I had not informed her of the rather mortifying details of my office arrangement with Mr. Gripes. I feel sure that the Committee will appreciate my motives when I explain that I had merely mentioned casually to Mrs. Zilch that I was sharing an office with Mr. Gripes and when Mrs. Zilch, from this fact inferred that I was working in collaboration with Mr. Gripes I did not deem it necessary to disillusion her. Mrs. Zilch had been reliably informed by the manicurist at her beauty parlor that Mr. Gripes' salary was $4000 a week and she was very happy over this association of mine. She urged me to invite Mr. Gripes to a cocktail party and I did so. At Mrs. Zilch's suggestion I again invited Miss Parsons, Miss Hopper, Mr. Skolsky and Miss Gwynn. The party was not a success. Mr. Gripes did not show up and neither did Miss Parsons, Miss Hopper, Mr. Skolsky or Miss Gwynn. Although I was naturally incensed at this affront on the part of Mr. Gripes, I made light of the matter and on the surface our relations remained friendly and cordial. On the Monday following the party (which was held on Saturday) Mr. Gripes explained that he had been called to Palm Springs to confer with Mr. Hoffheimer and Miss Burner on the Burner story. Mr. Gripes asked me to convey his apologies to Mrs. Zilch, which I agreed to do. It was in the course of this conversation with Mr. Gripes that I foolishly confided in him. In an illconsidered moment I told him of my sense of frustration in the matter of personal publicity. Mr. Gripes affected to be extremely sympathetic. He told me, in effect, that he considered me to be a highly talented writer. He said that he was greatly impressed by some of the gags from The Marinated Corpse which I had related to him. I make no secret to the Committee of the fact that I was flattered by this attitude of Mr. Gripes. While I did not accept as authentic the report of Mrs. Zilch's manicurist regarding Mr. Gripes' salary, I nevertheless knew him to be a man receiving at least $3000 a week and I was impressed. I asked Mr. Gripes whether he employed a press agent to keep his name constantly in the syndicated columns. Mr. Gripes maintained that he had never employed a press agent. He said that it was merely a matter of knowing the right people and doing the right thing at the right time and in the right place. While we were on this subject Miss Hepplethwaite came into the office with Mr. Gripes' coffee and the evening paper. By a strange coincidence there was a story on the front page relating to a pugilistic incident in a cafe between Mr. Nicholas Boff, also a member of the Screen Writers' Guild, and a prominent director. In discussing the matter with Mr. Gripes I made the observation that punching people in the nose at a night club seemed to be a sure-fire method of achieving front-page publicity. Mr. Gripes conceded that this was very true. ' I "HAT night I discussed the mat■* ter at greater length with Mrs. Zilch, who was even more deeply impressed by my observation than Mr. Gripes. Mrs. Zilch, I might add, has a remarkably retentive memory and she was able to recite literally scores of front page stories in which people had punched people in the nose at night clubs, thereby achieving front page publicity. Fired by Mrs. Zilch's obvious enthusiasm we continued the discussion no longer hypothetically, but as a practical plan. Both Mrs. Zilch and I inclined to the view that the project was fraught with great possibilities and very little danger. None of the participants, insofar as we could remember, had ever been severly injured physically or legally prosecuted. By implication, however, we agreed that they had all achieved increased stature. We recalled that all those who traded punches were in the $3000 a week class, or had graduated to this category very shortly thereafter. Bearing in mind what Mr. Gripes had said about the right people, Mrs. Zilch and I carefully considered a list of possible people whom I could punch. Mrs. Zilch was anxious for me to play it safe and she suggested that I select someone of outstanding and unquestioned prominence to punch, preferably someone like Mr. Louis B. Mayer. I immediately told Mrs. Zilch that this would not be politic. I explained, of course, that I did not question Mr. Mayer's outstanding prominence, but I pointed out to Mrs. Zilch that I had never worked for MGM, that I hoped some day to work for MGM — that I had nothing against Mr. Mayer personally and that I believed it might prejudice my chances if I should punch Mr. Mayer in the nose, either in a nightclub or anywhere else. The following day I told Mr. Gripes of my conversation with Mrs. Zilch and I confided to him that I The Screen Writer, April, 1948