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Tacsday, Marcli 1, 1932 TIMES SQUARE—SPORTS VARIETY 49 MARY OF A STOOGE By Claude Binyon Mllwaukee-^Thursday. yit drove all the way from JoUct to here arid this Isn't the kind of actor I wanted to be. J always thought that actors rode around In prlvaite cars but Mr. Clay carries us In his old broken down Chalmers like we were sacks <>f potatoes. .■V/ben we Anally epet to; a town we have to so right on the stage with-, out hardly any sleep and the peo- ple don't clap at us like they would If we got. all freshed up riding around fn private cars. Milwaukee is a. pretty good city, I was here once before when my Uncle Thaddeus died, fuid the the- atre Is okay. Biit I'm getting sick if Joe Tlionjias, the rOther stooge, hecause. he's so jealous he's always saying things about me to Mr. Clay and trying to ruin my acting, know why the stooge that I took bis place went crasy, Joe Thomas idrbve bim nut?. This hotel we are In reminds me •t iny Uncle lYank's house. He hias 10 children and no money; Milwauke^T-Thursd^iy. . Mr, Clay got drunk last night after I wrote, in my diary and the act was better oh the last show than when he is sober. And right after we finished and were going to our dressing room. Mr. Clay gave me and Thomas each |10. He told lis to beat It before he got sobered up and took the money away from us asrairi. Thomas and I are in the same room at the hotel and he got drunk too on bis $10 and finally came home looking: like somebody had us6d him tor bait. He's a funny looking thing anyway. He started pulling everything out of the dres- eer drawers and he came across a letter from TlUie. He started read Ing It out lotid before I could stop blm and making dirty cracks. I jumped out of bed and grabbed the letter and he punched me in the nose while I wasn't looking. Then I punched him In the eye and be fell down on. the floor like he was dead. I got scared and somebody knocked, on the door and. asked what was the matter. I said I had clipped out of the tub but I wa,s okay and please, get away and lot me sleep. After whoever it was went away . I carried Thomas to bed . and took everything: oft but his long under- wear and I finally went to sleep be- cause he was breathing. My nose was all bloody and I looked terrible when I woke up the n,ext morning. Thomas woke up, too, and he' looked at me without -saying any- thing. I thought sure I was going to lose my Job as a stooge. When Mr. Clay saw us, me with my nose kind of bloated and Thomas with his purple eye, he laughed and said now we really looked like stooges. He asked us how.lt happened and.I said Thomas bumped into a door and I got up to seo what was the matter and bumped Into Thomas. Instead of saying I was a liar like I was afraid he would, Thomas Just said he wanted a separate room because 1 always played the banjo lousy arid he couldn't sleep, I. couldn't say •inything but Clay told Thomas: to 4ult squawking all the time.. Today was a swell day. The mln- ■ute I fell into the coffin people Etarted laughing and when me and Mr. Clay had the flght with the dumriiy they alriioist went crazy. . I wrote a letter to Tillie and took a. cold shower. Milwaukee—r Monday. We're still hanging around here and I didn't see Mr. Clay today, can play the first 10 notes, of Rhap sody In Blue now. : Rain today and probably Tues day.' . ■ ; ■■ ' Milwaukee—^Thursday. 1 asked Mr. Clay where we go from hiere and be said yes. He's getting absent minded. Then I ■sked him if he wanted to have me play the bfnjo In the act now be- eause it was a good looking banjo and he said not to bother him. I got ii letter from Tillle saying *he was so lonesome she wished we bad got married iso she could travel with me. Mom sierit me a letter, too, about keeping my throat cov- ered when the weather is like this. I'm getting used to hanging around the actors. They're Just like other, people only louder dressed. . .. Milwaukee—Sunday, we didn't go any place last night ■^nd Mr. Clay said we may have to if^y Oft a couple of nights. I'm . ;M-aoticlng on my banjo and Thomas poes- out of the room pretcndimj c.nn't. stand-It. I?oy, is he a pain put Ills black sye looks funny. Milwauket^'Tuesday. Am I burned up? -the hotel clerk toid ;me! that Mr. Clay checked out last night and left nve and Thomas flati We haven't any mOney ami the. hotel clerk says wb owe for our, bill. I couldn't believe my ears, but Thomas could his. He said Mr, Clay was a dirty rat and I didn't argue with hlni. We 9at oni the bed for a while and then Thomas said he had an idea. He lyould go outside aind stand under our win dow and I should throw the suit- cases put. Then I Should walk but just as though I was going for a datei with a dentist or fiomething and we wouldn't have to pay thie bill. Before I haid time to think about it Thomaa went out, and wheii I looked put he was standing giving me a little wave. I opened the w;in- dpw a:nd threw his suitcase down and then went to get riiine. When I cariie back to the window arid looked out Thomas" was gone. I should have "known. rve been sitting hero all day afraid to go out and I'm hungry. I don't know what to do and I want to go home. Botb Showmen Out of Seattle Mayoralty Scrap . , Seattle, Feb. 49. "Vic Meyers, band leader and Jazz candidate for mayor of Seattle, fin- ished sixth in a field of 10. In the primary election held Feb. 23. Frank Edwards, ex-showman and ex- mayor, flnlsiied third. SO both are out of the running:. Meyers had ia clow^n campaign back of him, creating worlds of mirth arid satire on politics and city campaign promises. He got over 5,000 votes. John Dore. with 45,000 votes, and Mayor Bob Harlin. with 22,000, w<^e the two nominated for the finals of March 9. ' Eldwards polled 17,000, Case about 12,000, and Ritchie, seri- ous candidate of Seattle 'Star,' 8,?00. MARRIAGES Claiborne Foster to Maxwell Jay Rice about two weeks a^o. An- nouncement delayed until they had left to make tiieir home in Brazil. Groom is connected with an aviation transport company. Octavia Powell to Attorney Gor- don Burris, Feb. 20; in Canton, O. Miss Powell a member of Ambler stock company in Canton. Victor Fratellinl to Suzanne Rousseau, both members of well known circus families, in Paris. Arthur Frahm, treasurer at Er- langer's Columbia, and Virginia Sllveria, treasurer at Tobls Film- BJ-te, Feb. 27, in San Fraincisco. ^Catherine Glenn to Hubert Ames Kay in Chicago, Feb. 20. Bride Is a member of the Glenn Sisters duo with the NBC studios in Chicai^o. Groorii not in thO profession. Cyrena Van Gordon to Howard D. Smith, New York, Feb. 27. Bride is in Chicago Opera company. Cornelia Rogers, of.'Scandals,* to Russ Brown, vaudeville, Greenwich, COnn., Feb. 23.: Bruce MacFarland' and Marion Bums, Febl 26 ,ln New York, Bride- groom Is with. •Wild Waves,' bride with "irhcy Don't! Mean Any Harm.' BIRTHS Paul and Anna Savoy, son, jPeb 24i in New York. Father Is a vaude agent.- Mr. and Mrs. Joseph P; Kennedy, son, Feb. 22, at Dorchester, Mas?/, boy. This is the ninth child and fourth son of thfe film jinancier. Mr. and Mrs. Tom Fiiidale, daughter, Feb. 26, at Presbyterian llb'spital, Chicago. Father Is -ivith NBC publicity department'in Chi- cago. . Mr. anfl Mrs. ■ Irving Doj-iiji. daughlpr,. l-'cb. 21, Xew i'oi . Trade Mugg Hollywood, Feb. 29. Teacher at Franklin School, Hollywood, Informed her pupils that on the following day there -would be a lesson in drawing, and each pupil should bring to class a picture magazine. One kid showed up with 'Variety.', MILLER TAKES BEATING FROM imER IN LIMIT By JACK PULASKI Ray Miller, the. Chi liook special- ist, waar clearly outpointed by a tough little niugg known as Sammy FuUtF, of Boston, at, tbo Garden last Syiday (26). In the fourth round a right cross .to the -whiskers toppled Ray but being cocky he hoijped right up. 'v^Never . did he seem to have Samriiy In trouble and it went the 10 round route. V Miller hasn't had much luck around New York. He had his chance for big money when he stalled here with Jlriimy McLamln a ,year or so back. Of course Baby Face stalled too but he: got a fiop fight pn pointfl. Ray. had built a great rep In a few months by getting a. technical knock-out oVer McLarnin and kayolng a couple of other hard guys too. That -vyas in Detroit. Fuller Jumped Into the Met sport pages by. giving Tony Canzoneri one of the busiest . evenings in. his career. That was In Boston wher6 Tony was knocked oft his pins too. It was rather a bitter defeat for Miller but it seemed a matter of a veteran vp aga.Inst an eager youngster. Fuller Is smallish chap, referred to when thie decision was announced by Joe Hmnphrics as the little John Ia Sullivan of Boston.* His arms are short and his shoulders bunchy. That he otit- punched so good a man as Miller was an eye-opener. Miller devoted too much attention to trying to land with the left. As the match progressed Fuller was landing more acctirately -with that mit than Ray. The way Sammy connected wiUi rights was another angle that surprised. Perhaps this Fuller bird is somebody but as one bit Ray's rooters put it: .'He can't think of getting married and fight- ing at the same time.' Piadner Not Hot Semi-final was not so hot^ It going on last because' of a radio stunt. Emile Piadner, better known as 'Spider* from France made his debut against Anton Kocsis, a P'olander or something. Both are flyweight bantams, and Piadner came with a rep of having knocked out Frankie Genaro in Paris. After seeing Kocsis slap M. Piadner around the boys started to figure and the result was that Frankie was full of bubbly when he took It. Not that the Spider hasn't action but his' power punch is doubted. The Judges called.it a draw and that gave the French- man the break for it looked like he -was on the losing end. What this Gregorio -will do to him is fairly certain, unless the Spider can take more tiiari indicated. House better than expected but only about 50% with many walk-outs during the finale match. <, ' . .. Battaliiio—Petrolle Next No boxing, this week at the Gar- den, the six day bike eggs being In action. Next card of importance will be topped by Bat Battaliho, and BiUy Petrolic, March 11. that fight should be something, - It was all cookied up but Bat made a bad error in Cincinnati recently when he boxed a stablemate and .both were thi'dwn out of the ring for cause. It has all been squared apparently. Bat is a corking fighter and Petrolle is one of the wonder men Of the ring. Eat Until Burstmg-Filin Stars Entertain, Banl ai^ Tiy Pint Bottles as Biz Stimulant-^And Okay Detroit, Feb. 29. Activity in the liquor trade across the. border has been stimulated by th€| addition of pint bottles to the Ganadia.n Diquor Commission. Cus- tom guards are twice as alert as before. . Business across the river in rum had fallen oft to :a considerable ex tent and the sinaJler bottles werie brought out to try for on Increase, Commission had stocked but quarts. Price charges, for the. pints range from $3.50 to $4:50. With the bottles sriialler and easily concealed, the tourists find, it more; convenient. It's improved trade. ' NEW SAT. NIGHT CLUB FOR PROFESSIONALS The new Saturday night supper dance club of New York legitimate istage folk g'ot under way last week. It's flO a plate, known as the 'Pl^ri'ette' and is to take place reg- ularly, if plans matin-e, at the hotel Pierre on 5 th Ave. Robert Hai't, broker. Is reputedly behind the venture, which will do- nate part of the receipts of the opening to the Actors' Dinner Club. Invitation committee consists of Mary Na.sh, Basil Bathbone, Xaw- rcnce Tibbett arid.'Leslie Howard. H£rry Rosenthal'ia orchestra is the terpsichorean inducement. Arch Selwyn is also reported connected with the room seating about 260; Saviiig the Tront' Number of ofllce suites occupied by producers, agents, writers and others connected with the building or booking of acts is estimated to have decreased S0% or less this sea- son. As high as a half dozen people are sharing the same offices with two or three splitting one desk and its telephones. Surprise Is the meagre amount of friction or ten- sion. In other days it would have been murder. When tiiei man who holds a lease on an oflnce suite permits renting of space to an outsider, and they divvy up on overhead, he is finding it pos- sible, it's pointed out, to retain his address where otherwise , he might be forced to move to a less preten- tious building. Rag's Staff Clainas ifOs Angeles, Feb.. 29. Edward Hugh Gibbons, engaged as managing editor of 'Theatrical World,' recently started Coast weekly in ix).s Angeles, has filed a wage claim of $9{» against the sheet for three weeks' work. Employer offered to settle this claini for $20 casih. Sheet is ostensibly published by Arch Woody, agency partner of Ralph Wldman, but said to be nmJnly backed by the printer, Joseph HJlleiibrand. Ilenry M. Fine also lias a claim for: $37 r>cil- torj'al -vvork agaln.st 'Theatrical World.' Maestro and Wife Sue For Hockey Injuries Peggy Hope Rich, ex-actress, and her husband. Freddie Rich, CBS maestro, respectively think .that injuries to Mrs. Rich at Madison Square Garden during a hockey match are worth $50,000 and $10,000 damages to each. Mrs. Rich was hit by a flying hockey stick at a game Dec. 13. Julius Kcndler, attorney for the pair, recounts that the former ac- tress suffered permanent injuries .on tho forehead and scalp, while the husband's petition is for tech- nical ^oss of services. Girl-s Suicide Worcestier, Mass., Feb. W. The body of Eleanor Kingston, 30, New York chorus girl, was found in a lake here, wmpped in silks and furs. She had been visiting her parents and leilt them a note. A sister lis in a Broadway show. ZEIXY UP AGAIN Shlp^Teck Kelly -went a-flag i>ole slttin' again Wednesday (24) atop the Manhattan hotel, on West 47th street, New York, Hopes to be up 13 days, IS'hours and 13 minutesJ'. . There are eight telescopes, in Longaore Square., again tralhed upon Kelly at 5c a look. McGEAW'S GOMMEEGIAL Los Angele."!, Feb. 29. John McOraw, manager of, the New York Giants, may go on a commercial .radio profixarn when the baseball .sea.son rolls around. nasoball veteran ifl considering an V B[ollywood, Feb. 29. All you can eat for 45 cents plus an 'bp^portunity to . see Zazii Pitta and Thelina Todd in a nightly per- sonal appearance broadcasting from th& restaurant . and perhaps a free ticket to a picture show. It's the newest business stimulator for ,the Leightoii. oafeteria in the lieart of the city, Tiio meal-Pit'ts-Tpdd combination Is set, but the Incluslpn of the free theatre ticket is still in the nego- tiation stater House that proBably will be in on the deal Is tiie Los Angeles, swanky architecturally but now on a 15-cents basis. Film teaim will be on the air pver KNX in a continuity comedy aftair now being written by a Metro scen- arist. ; Pair will go on over remote control from the restaurant, back of a glass screen to eliminate the dish rattling and other acoustic com- petition. Loud speaker system also goes in so nobody will miss thei lines. Cafeteria has an orchesU^ too.. Radio . act will be six timea a week at the dinner hour to catch the yokelry who. -will be at- tracted by the picture names. Caf^ can take care of 2,600 at a sitting. liines Si Food ; Figtt wWiA^ Kinds of Prices A swell food fight Is belnfi: waged on Broadway. - With restaurants, outnumbering other kinds of busi- ness enterprises in and su:x>und Times Square the battle centering around meals Is the. more notice- able. : All _ types of hasherles are con- cerned. FVom the throw it at your- self Joints to the class spots. Thers isn't a block along Broadway with- out at least one restaurant, land that one displaying a new low prices. A one time cafetera meal at 60c is now two bits. In a rated eatery the nick is likewise In half. Trick Inducements in force, everywhere. Second cups of coftee and. a third after that; Inexpensive combinations for all three dixily meals and additional helpings of the diner's favorite course. Another source of annoyance, according to a former restauranteur of Broadway, is the increasing num- ber of d;rug and candy store out- lets. As all Joints are now doing, they too feature low priced com- binations oyer the counter. Tlils hurts the straight food serving spots.. ACT PAINFULLY BANGED UP IN AUTO WRECK '''Rhinebeck, N. y., Feb. 29. Making a jump via automobile four members of the Norman Thomas Quintet cracked up here, last week. One of the two cars in which the troupe was hopping from Mont- real to New York swerved from the highwaiy and crashed Into .a. tree. Norman Thomas, Sh, head of the turn, told state troopers he thought he fell asleep while at the wheell In Rhinebeck hospital doctors diag- nosied his Injuries as a fractured left arm, leg; and lacerations. Others taken to the hospital were Norman Thomas, Jr., who suftered laceration; Gene Ballord, a punc- tured wound on the chin and loosened teeth; Frank Allen, treated for shock and minor flcratches. Two other members of the adt were following Thomas' cax in an- other machine. Force of the Im- pact nearly demolished the leading car. Conrads May Settle The Eddie Gonrads (Marion Eddy) may settle their alimony split out of court. Miss Eddy, Conrad's former partner, is asking $300 a week, and the cpmpdlan counters that he's broke and that hi.s wife dissii>ated th'> major portion of hi.s income. ^ Coniad Is brcjiklng In a new act.