Variety (January 1954)

PICTURES Forty-eighth j Inniversary Wednesday, January 6, 1954 Throwing Shakespeare For A Prat-Fall By THEODORE PRATT Bill Shakespeare, the theatre man, has a long reach from the grave. He comes into the lives of everybody named Pratt, of which I am one. In Bill’s time there was an Elizabethan expression, "prat,” wrich meant ‘ buttocks,” or the rear part of the anatomy. Bill took up the term and used it in a number of his plays. 'Til prat you,” one of his characters says, meaning, "I’ll spank you.” Bill popularized the term so that it came down through the years in the theatre, ending up in burlesque, where the term, ‘‘pratfall,’* became universal. From there it has come into the modern colloquial language, with many people now using the expression. For some time I have appointed myself a committee of one Pratt to protect all people named Pratt from the misuse of our good name. To all who do not know better I point out that a sudden, ignominious sitting down on the posterior is a "pratfall,” not a "Prattfall,” as some mistakenly use it. You take a pratfall as a hyphenated word, in lower case, and with only one t. If you don’t, you are out of order. Mr. Webster, rival dictionaries, and "The American Thesaurus of Slang,” all substantiate this. •: The same spelling of the term, with much the same connotation, appears for other meanings^ The back pocket of trousers in some circles is referred to as a "prat.” In the underworld a "pi-atman” is a pickpocket or “prat digger” who goes on a "prat prowl.” This last term is also used by the police when conducting the search of a person’s rear pockets. A "prat cutter” is a pocket knife kept in the hip pocket. A “prat poke” is a term for a pocketbook kept in the same “pTaceT nr^prat1' also nieahk'^CS^dT^’ay.'^g'^'diKr^'afK^albng;' presumably applied because the rear of a person is seen as he leaves. Ted Pratt I One-Man Campaign Among those who have, had the excellent wisdom to accept the evidence i after I pointed it out to them.) that the term "prat,” arid the fine, upstanding name, “Pratt.” have no connection whatever, are Variety. Earl Wilson. H. Allen Smith, Robert Wilder, the old N. Y. Evening Sun. and another. Bill — William G. Lengel; editor-in-chief of Gold Medal Books, publishers of "Escape to Eden,” by a man named Pratt, 35c on any paperback rack. Life magazine, unlike these, did not acknowledge my correction, but after I made it 1 noticed that its spelling improved, at least most of the time, or whenever the editors remembered. H. L. Mencken, who i* accepted as the last word on these things, uses me as a reference authority on the subject, in the second volume of his "American Language,” firmly pointing out that it is. prat and not Pratt. Mr, John O'Hara, a fine, first-class, exCelleiit author, did not heed any correction even from scratch. He knew, being something of a theatre man himself. . When he writes in a story, “You’re going to sit on jour prat in Vermont” he knows the right place to sit. and the proper way. to express it. Mr. Joel Sayre, however, another writer, is not of this calibre . at all. On his st-ory, "The Man on the Ledge,” as pui> lished in The Mew Yorker, he has a character named Glaco state, "I’ll lay niy prat't on the sill.” Tc.h, tch. New Yorker!;-.. This dangerous literary* path leads to making enemies .of : people named Pratt, of which there are many thousands in the country. Included is Boris Karloff, whose rear name is Pratt, while ah awfuljot of the Standard Oil Co. is owned by Pratts. . ' There is only one problem about all this that we Pratts probably never. will be able to lick. When the term is used orally there is no way to make a distinctiori between the correct “prat” and the Wrong "Pratt.”. Finding some means to pronounce each differently beats us • Pratts where it hurts. The only advice I can give the membership on this is. when a person uses it in the presence of a Pratt, for the Pratt to say. witheringly. “Don’t look at me in your ignorance,” and proceed to give cuiting instructions about the term. At the .same time we don't flinch from the use of the term when properly applied, for it is a rich and colorful one. To support this statement I v.Bh to note that, following the whimsical fashion 6f giving names to houses, my heap at Boca Raton in Florida is labelled "prat-fall.” That confuses everybody except Elizabethan scholars— rather scarce in these parts — and enthusiasts ofWurlesque, of which there are quite a few about. No Business like Shmoe Business By PETE SMITH Hollywood. And Sbmoe's business is selling show business short. I’m sure you'll r^jpgnize shmoes breed after having imbibed of this tiny treatise, regardless of your vintage. Actually, Shmoe is ageless. He's been around ever since Eve broke in her apple act. at Locw’s Garden of Eden. At. the time Shmoe said, "She'll be a flop. The kid needs a wardrobe. Does that give you a clue? Sure, Shmoe is strictly a. Weeper . . . a cry-baby . . . the original "blues” singer. It was Shmoe who was first in line at., the wailing wall when the cinema made its debut. "Who wants to watch those jumping, tintypes when you can see real fleshand-blood actors?” he asked. “No^ body” he answered. ( Shmoe is like that — he asks questions and then answers them.) "Movies will never last,. They are strictly a novelty:” Later those same jumping tinlypcs gave out with sound and Shmoe turned on the tear ducts thusly: "People go to a theatre to . relax, so you give them talkies and wake them up.” Then <cairie color and Shmoe again went into a dither. "Anyone knows colored moving pictures are bad for the eyes. Yo.iFIl drive ’em away with headaches.” Yes, the Shmoes are ever with us. Today, perhaps, even more so than at any time during ' theatrical history, the Shmoes continue to be the weeds in the Garden of Show Business. They are still trying to sell the industry short. You meet them every day as they lugubriously bemoan our future. "TV is stealing the show” they say. "IIow can the theatres compete with free entertainment at home?” Well, the answer to that qhe is, "What about ‘The Robe,’ ‘Shane,’ 'From Here To Eternity,’ ‘Band Wagon,’ ’Mogambo,’ ‘Little Boy Lost,’ ‘Gentlemen Prefer Blondes,’ ‘Stalag 17,’ among others, Which are currently kicking the pants off some of the top grosses of the yesteryear, Also ‘Kiss Me Kale,' ‘Roman Holiday.’ ‘Caine Mutiny,’ ‘Executive Suite.’ ‘The Cantor ■Story / ‘Red Garters,’ ‘River Of No Return,’ ‘Dial M for Murder,.’ all of which should keep the boxoffice ticket machines clicking a sweet rhapsody.” And when a branch of show business, such as the movie branch, WILLIAM HAIRSTON Currently— • "Take the High Ground” (MGM) New York STEPHEN DRAPER , JU 6-4180 Hollywood SID GOLD AGENCY cit 6-2338 endeavors to march forward with the advancing times by making important scientific strides via Cinerama, Cineramascope and other widescreen processes generally (not to mention stereophonic sound), the Shmoes wag their heads and again tell you it’s all in vain For years, the Shmoes have said that double bills are a "must” in picture houses. T hese'cTai in s h ay e been made despite the fact that the Interstate Theatre Circuit of Texas, guided by the astute Bob O’Donnell, has one of the most successful and profitable operations in the couritry, favoring a single bill policy. Interstate and O’Donnell have proved over a pe: riod of many years that it is not necessary to run two features on the same program. Pictures of the calibre mentioned elsewhere in this compendium do not require a questionable second feature to lend it any boxoffice allure. I happen to subscribe to that school that never believed a questionable second feature helped any program. I can’t imagine a merchant featuring one top-grade article and then throwing in a second shoddy item to attract sales. That would tend to ruin any man's business eventually. Not content with the second questionable feature, some of the boys also threw in Bingo and Bank Nights, as well as other giveaway gimmicks. The folks who put it on the line aren’t intrigued by that sort of shenanigans any more. It may have served its purposes at one time but we are in a different business today. For next year Metro will make only 18 features which is a reduction of about .40 rb compared with previous production slates of that company. From present indications this seems to be the trend at other studios. These pictures will be high budget pictures— made by the foremost creative brains in the show world — writers, directors and producers. With the return of top product, as indicated, We may anticipate a return to the type of showmanship that flourished during the single bill era. Exhibitors having fewer features to program will be encouraged to properly merchandise quality product. Any exhibitor worthy of the name is pro’ud to exploit attractions he knows will please his patrons. I feel reasonably certain those attractions will be his good fortune from now on. At least there has never been such a concentration on the making of important pictures as there is today. No Foresight The Shmoes are not content to plug an attraction unless the cast is headed by some of the stalwarts who have proved their worth over a period of years. .Far-sighted 'studio executives, however, ai^e ever developing new talent that will some day march in the front ranks of the picture parade just as the lop stars are doing today. How’s a boii t some of these kids, a)l of whom have outstanding talent: Debbie Reynolds, Rock Hudson, Dale Robertson, Jane Powell, Pier Angeli, Mitzi Gaynor, Bob Wagner, Tony Curtis, Keefe Brasselle, &nd we could go on almost indefinitely. They’re all deserving of S-D I've been spat at and thrown at And I've ducked evil passes; But they wouldn't dam hit hie While I'm wearing glasses. Theatre TV: Theatre? TV for Gus H. Fanno Has a simple frame— Notre Dame and Marciano, Or Marciano and Notre Dame. Subscription TV: The list of things you get for free They carefully finecomb. Now comes subscription-type TV: You. pay io stay at home. Tax: Whether your show is a hit so grand Or a flop without any skill, It's bound to get at least one hand— Your Uncle Sam's— in the till. Product: Lots of pundits, lots of strictures; What this business needs is pictures. Stereo Sound: Stereo sound will improve, It appears. Wish I could say the same for my ears. Vandalism : . I wonder where the well-bred kid . With cheeks so healthy pink went And what the devil changed him To a juvenile delinquent. ..r. Recording: For one poor, lonely little soul They’re throwing out a dragnet. He ruiried a juncture — one whole roll— By passing with a magnet. Overseas Shooting: It’s fun in Paris and fun in Rome Or Bangkok or Madrid. • As long as your pictures are bought back home And they let you return here, kid. Critics: A critic reviewing a brand new show, Like a gal asked to transgress, May feel more honest saying no. But more popular saying yes. • Investigations: The gents from Washington want to be sure That films are ideologically pure. If the job they do is extra good, They’ll have to call filmland HOLY wood. Drive-Ins: Drive-in owners knock, on wood With refreshment business good. Bad films never leave 'em flustered, "Like when they run ' out of mustard. Dubbing: The dubbing of pictures is strictly a plus-— The foreigners speak so much better than us. Folkways Dept.: I used to neck at the movies when They made my passions smoulder. I wonder — were films hotter then Or am I that much older? Financial: Film hope still springs With yearning eternal For favorable things lit the Wall Street Joutnah proper exploitation— the kind that pays big dividends. Reluming to Shmoe and his relatives (and we’re throwing in his relatives because they should be ‘‘thrown in”), they have a way of sounding off to the press periodically about Show Business. Arid do they have anything good to say to the press about that sarrie Show Business from which they derive their livelihood? (And aren’t you the funny one to ask such a question?) . Tile Shmoes are truly our Ambassadors of No-Good Will. They tell the press about the poor attractions that are being produced, about the bad business being done, about fhe theatres that are clos-l ing or will soon close. Can you imagine Gimbel, Macy and Saks giving out with such dirgey dialog ; about their business, their riier chand^ie7\their stores,, their future? . n. Then yoU'll find Shmoe, among the exhibitors, taking pot-shots at Shmoe, among the distributors, and vice versa. They, air their troubles before the world and that same world raises its eyebrows and wonders. Withal, let it be said to the credit of all concerned that the Shmoes herein depicted are not typical but you and I know they exist. . ... Fortunately, the great majority of showfolk march along with h* ving Berlin .singing, "There's ho Business Like Show , Business; And they, really mean it. That s why it’ll always be. a great business despite the. Shmoes in our ranks Whose mournful mou things will '.continue' 'to give us a pain m the prattle.